A World With You
by Newt27
Summary: From the author of Darling, You're Mean and Give Me Love comes the final installment of Kyleigh Montgomery and Jasper Hale. This story is a journey of love, loss, secrets, and dreams. Finish reading Kyleigh's story; fall in love with Jasper all over again; explore the complexities of relationships and most of all, enjoy the constant wit Kyleigh brings to everything she does.
1. Lets get lost

**Five years ago, I wrote Darling, You're Mean, which detailed the journey of Kyleigh Montgomery and Jasper Hale. Just last year, I decided to delve deeper into Kyleigh's history with a prequel entitled Give Me Love. This is the sequel to Darling, You're Mean. Before you can read A World With You, go back and read the previous two stories. Don't worry, we'll wait. Okay, all caught up? Excellent. Enjoy the final installment of the Kyleigh Montgomery saga.**

Kyleigh Whitlock-Hale sat on the back porch staring out at the rain. The book on her lap lay forgotten, though she kept a finger on it to hold it in place. So intent was for focus on the drizzle that she didn't hear the deck door open.

"Kyleigh?" Jasper said softly from the doorway.

"Hm?" she murmured, turning her attention to her husband. "What's up?

"I just wanted to see where you'd disappeared off to." He walked across the deck, leaning against the support beam.

"Just meditating, enjoying the weather."

"Because it doesn't rain enough for you?" he teased lightly.

She smiled at him. "Other parts of the country are in a drought. We should enjoy this while we can."

"Oh, so ominous." He pretended to shudder.

She swatted in his direction, though she was laughing. "What's going on?"

"Do you want to come inside and watch a movie with me? You can pick any Johnny Depp you want."

She stood up slowly, still holding her place in her book. "Five years later, and you're still willing to watch some good old JD with me?"

"For you, darling, anything." He pulled the door open for her, allowing her to pass through before following her inside.

Many Johnny Depp movies later, Kyleigh lay resting against Jasper's chest, the most relaxed she'd been in awhile.

"I was thinking," he said, sounding casual, "That maybe we could go on a trip soon."

"A trip?" Kyleigh sat up slowly. "A trip where?"

He shrugged. "Wherever you would like, my dear. Europe, perhaps? Or maybe somewhere in Canada?"

"Alaska sounds nice."

"That's neither Europe or Canada, but yes, it would be great this time of year."

"I'd have to talk to Carlisle, of course," she said, pretending not to notice Jasper stiffen slightly.

"Of course. Maybe he'll even come with us."

"Nonsense, Jas, he can't leave his patients. I just need to discuss a few things with him, that's all."

"Like what?" Jasper too sat up, dislodging her from his chest.

"I've had this idea brewing in my head for awhile. I wanted to talk to him before I brought it up to you. Didn't want to waste your time with my silly thoughts," she added quickly at the look on his voice, though this did nothing to appease him.

"It didn't used to be this way, Ky," he said quietly, sounding a little desperate. "You used to tell me everything. What happened?"

She gave him a 'you know why' kind of look. "I'll explain later. We can definitely go on a trip once I work things out with Carlisle, okay?"

"Fine," he said in a voice that implied this was anything but fine.

Up in Carlisle's study, Kyleigh found the doctor pouring over thick, dusty books. He didn't even look up to see who it was, instead just saying "hello Kyleigh, what can I do for you?"

"Carlisle, it's like you have the sixth sense," she teased. She flopped herself down on a chair across from his desk, waiting for him to give her his undivided attention.

He soon shut his book carefully then looked up at her, his usual smile playing around his mouth. "What can I do for you, little one?"

"Carlisle, I want to find my mother," she said, deciding that beating around the bush would be useless.

"For obvious reasons, I think that's a bad idea, Kyleigh. For one thing, you're supposed to be dead," he started but Kyleigh cut him off.

"Hear me out: remember almost ten years ago when you were trying to figure out the timeline for my illness and how it didn't add up?" She didn't wait for him to agree. "I've been thinking it over. What if I was adopted and my biological mother had HIV and died of AIDS or was just too sick to take care of me? That would explain why my parents insisted I had cursed blood that needed to be purged. And it explains why they let me go so easily. I wasn't theirs, I belonged to someone else." Kyleigh' eye shined brightly, more brightly than usual.

Carlisle considered this carefully. "If she truly was that sick, she would be dead by now. It's been 24 years."

"Maybe we can just track down a death certificate then, or something. That would put it all together. That would be the missing puzzle piece I've, _we've_ been looking for!"

"It would be, but how would you do it? You can't very well contact your parents and ask them."

Kyleigh had grown animated. "If I were adopted in Washington, it wouldn't be that hard. Presumably if my real mom died, which she must have cause why else would she have given me up, then we can look for death certificates with AIDS related illnesses as the cause of death."

"What if she's still alive?" Carlisle began taking notes; Kyleigh wondered what he was writing.

"Do you suppose we could somehow go through adoption records?"

"I don't think so, if it was a closed adoption. And again, you're dead, it would raise a lot of questions if you showed up asking about it."

"What if Jasper did it? Saying that he thought I was his sister or his girlfriend or something?"

"What has Jasper said about this?" Carlisle put the pen down, giving her the piercing look she'd grown used to.

"I haven't told him yet. Only that I might have an idea for a trip for us."

"Is that the other reason you want to go? Do you think by finding your mother, you'll save your marriage?"

His direct address of it surprised her; though Kyleigh and Jasper's faulty relationship was well known in the family, it had mostly remained the elephant in the room.

"It's a possibility, isn't it?" Kyleigh asked, her voice low.

"Perhaps." Carlisle picked up the pen again, twirling it between his fingers. "I'm sorry about this."

"Is isn't your fault. It's not his either." Kyleigh slid forward in her seat so she was closer to the young doctor. "But sometimes I think he should just go back to Alice and save us the trouble."

"That's assuming she'll take him back. You don't know Alice quite like we do. Besides," Carlisle cleared his throat, "I don't think it's too late for you yet."

"19 may have been too young," Kyleigh said, either not hearing Carlisle or choosing to ignore him. "Rosalie had mentioned being in love with the idea of love…"

"Forever is a long time, Kyleigh." Carlisle stood up. "It's not your fault," he repeated. "I think that you should use your best judgment."

"Is that your version of a blessing?" she asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"It's as close as you're going to get. Let me know if you need help." He briefly cupped her cheek with his hand then stepped out of the room, leaving her to wonder.

Kyleigh slid into the driver's seat of her mini cooper. Carlisle, Edward, and Rosalie had strongly advised against getting one, instead encouraging her to get a Mercedes or Volvo, but no one could talk her out of it. So it was with great glee that she received a dark green four-door mini for her first vampire birthday.

"This car gets terrible gas mileage," Rosalie warned after helping Kyleigh and Jasper load her car.

Kyleigh just shrugged. "I like driving it. Don't worry, we'll be fine. Right, Jas?" Kyleigh asked her husband, who had just climbed into the passenger seat.

"Maybe," he said, grimacing, "this car is a little small for me."

"I'm telling you, take the bigger car!" her sister urged.

Kyleigh shook her head. "This is my car, Rose. See you in a few weeks…or so …" Kyleigh giggled.

Jasper and Rosalie exchanged slightly horrified looks, which Kyleigh ignored, instead cranking the engine. Jasper just waved to Rosalie while Kyleigh backed out of the garage.

"So, to Washington?" Jasper asked after a few minutes of silence.

"Yup, makes the most sense, right?"

"Are you really, really sure you want to do this? It might make things worse," he warned.

"I think it will bother me more not knowing though." Kyleigh played around with the radio a little until she found a station playing Beyoncé. Jasper knew better than to interrupt Beyoncé, and waited until the song was over to ask again if Kyleigh was going to be okay with this journey.

"Ask me one more time and I'm kicking you out of the car." She tried to make a scary face but failed miserably, making Jasper laugh.

They were halfway to Bellevue when Jasper asked if Kyleigh had thought beyond finding her birth mother.

"I'm running under the assumption that she's dead. And if she isn't…I don't know. I don't know," she said again.

Jasper decided to drop it, which was fine with Kyleigh. She really didn't want to think too much about it yet.

They reached Bellevue around three in the afternoon. Kyleigh parked as far away from the hospital as she could, lest anyone saw her. "Okay, let's go over this again," Kyleigh said, after she'd cut the engine. "You're going to go into the hospital-"

"And ask if I can access the birth records because it was my adopted sister's dying wish to find out who her birth mother was," Jasper finished.

"And if they say they can't, then you-"

"Ask where I can go to find out, and emphasize that it was her dying wish."

"Talk about how pretty I was too, that usually makes people feel bad," Kyleigh added, then laughed at the look Jasper gave her. "Good luck, babe," she said. She leaned over and kissed him. When she pulled away, her surprise was mirrored on his face.

"Be back soon, darling." He winked at her.

Once he'd gone, Kyleigh reclined in her seat, closing her eyes. She hadn't kissed him like that in months, just out of the blue, totally naturally. She didn't have time to dwell on that though, she wanted to know the truth, because this had been eating away at her since the trial had ended: why did her parents hate her so much?

Jasper returned less than twenty minutes later. "No such luck, Ky. You have to go through some adoption center thing. She recommended doing one of those reunion website searches, but since you don't know her name…" he trailed off.

"Dead end." Kyleigh sighed.

"There's also the possibility that you weren't adopted, Kyleigh," he said, his voice low. "Sometimes, people are just really awful and do terrible things."

Kyleigh leaned her head back against her seat again. "I guess so, but I just feel like something is missing. Carlisle is right, the disease progressed really fast if I got it when I was twelve, plus I was sick all the time when I was a kid. It doesn't add up!" She hit her hand against the steering wheel, putting a small dent in it.

"Nicely done," Jasper teased.

"Oops." Kyleigh knocked on it gently to put it back in place. "Well, now what?"

"Head to the adoption center and see what we can find? If we find your birth certificate, we might be able to trace it back."

"Who's to say that I was even born here in Washington? What if I was born somewhere else and then they adopted me and brought me here?"

Jasper and Kyleigh sat in silence, contemplating this grim reality.

"Well," Jasper said finally. "I guess we have our work cut out for us."

"Do you know where else your parents lived before they hypothetically adopted you?" Rosalie asked. She had her new iPad in her lap, her long, pale fingers poised over the screen.

"Nope, no idea," Kyleigh said, sounding almost cheerful. She loved a good challenge. Eternal life could be so boring.

"Can't we just access their records or something?" Emmett asked. He leant against Rosalie's legs, playing with a tennis ball.

"I'm not sure. We can look into it." Esme noted this idea down on her notepad.

"Keep in mind they could just be aliens who abducted Kyleigh. Or maybe this is all a plot and _Kyleigh_ is the alien. Don't hit me!" Emmett groaned.

"If I were an alien, why would I be pursuing this?" Kyleigh pointed out.

"That's what always happens, isn't it? The whole thing that the dictator brings about his downfall because he can't just leave things be!"

Emmett went quiet at the looks on everyone's faces, ranging from confused to exasperated.

"I'm not sure I'm diabolical enough for that, Emmett," Kyleigh said finally.

"Don't sell yourself short, Ky," Carlisle said from the doorway. "Did I miss an invite to the party?" he added, taking in his family, all sprawled across the living room.

"We're trying to figure out what planet Kyleigh is from," Emmett said. "Stop hitting me!" He glared at Rosalie.

"We didn't have any luck in Bellevue and then Jasper pointed out that my parents may not have even adopted me in Washington, so we're pulling together resources to figure that out, then we can look for her."

Carlisle's expression was hard to read. He sat down next to Esme on the couch, looking at her notepad over her shoulder. Kyleigh was the only one watching Carlisle, waiting for his reaction. He looked up, briefly catching her eye, then looked back down.

"It would perhaps be smarter to track where your parents have lived before looking for her," Carlisle suggested.

"Oh right. Why didn't we think of that?" Kyleigh asked Jasper, who shrugged. "How do we do that? All I can think of is hiring a PI."

They sat in silence for a few minutes, presumably thinking it over.

"I think that's the only way to really do it, Ky," Jasper said, breaking the quiet. "I'm not really sure how else you can do that."

"You could try going to their last known address and see if you can trace it back that way," Esme suggested.

"The last one I knew of is the house we lived in before they abandoned me," Kyleigh said quietly. "And we never figured out where they went after that. Obviously."

Jasper squeezed her shoulder lightly. "We'll figure it out, love."

"Could we contact their lawyer from a few years ago, couldn't we? Would he tell us?" Rosalie asked.

"I doubt it. That probably falls under lawyer-client confidentiality or whatever." Kyleigh pulled her knees to her chest, thinking hard.

"Carlisle, could you call Maxwell and see if he can find out?" Esme asked.

Everyone turned to Carlisle, who didn't say anything right away. Finally he said, "I can call him tomorrow and ask, but that information is usually confidential."

"They showed up to our house unannounced that time, remember?" Emmett chimed in.

Of course they all remembered that day when they had to hide in the basement while Harold and Margaret screamed at Carlisle.

"That's true. I'll see what I can do." Carlisle still didn't sound forthcoming about it. Kyleigh made a note to ask him later.

"Do you think I'm crazy?" she asked Jasper later that night.

Jasper set aside the book on Marxism he'd been reading. "Not crazy, no, I can understand why you want to know. I'm just worried, and Carlisle is too."

Kyleigh sat down by his feet. "Worried why?"

"What if you weren't adopted and they really are your birth parents? Or what if you do find your birth mother. Then what?"

"I just want to put together the timeline for my disease."

Jasper gave her his best 'I don't believe you look.' "Really? Is that all?"

Kyleigh crossed her arms, feeling defensive. "What else could I want?"

"I don't know, Ky. Maybe answers for what happened ten years ago? Some sort of closure? I don't blame you, I'm just worried you won't find what you're looking for, and you'll only be hurt because of it."

"Newsflash, Jas, I'm a big girl. I can handle it." Kyleigh tried to smile reassuringly, though his disbelieving expression didn't change. "It's fine, honestly. You'll see." She patted his knee lightly.

"Carlisle wants to talk to you before he goes to the lawyer. Just so you know." Jasper's voice had suddenly gone cool.

"Oh, okay." Kyleigh got to her feet, his attitude change noted. "I'll see you in a bit then."

He didn't respond, just picked his book back up, shutting her out again.

Kyleigh knocked lightly on Carlisle's office door.

"Come in," she heard. She found him sitting behind his large wooden desk, surrounded by large books. Kyleigh glanced at them, noting that the majority were law books.

"Hi," she said. "You summoned me?"

"If telling Jasper I wanted to talk to you at some points counts as summoning, then yes. Have a seat." He smiled at her, putting her at ease.

"So what did you want to talk about, oh powerful one?" She curled her legs under her, making herself comfortable.

"I think you know what I want to talk about." He slid one of the books out of the way so he could lean his elbows on his desk.

"Let me guess-you think that me looking for my mother is a bad idea because I won't find the closure I'm looking for."

He smiled briefly at her joke, then his expression became serious again. "It's a valid concern, Kyleigh. Are you absolutely sure you want to go down this road?"

"This isn't just some whim, Carlisle. I really want to know, and I know that you want to figure it out too." Kyleigh thought back to the amount of times he'd gone over her spotty medical history.

"I do, but this isn't how I want to do it. I don't want you getting hurt anymore, little one. Haven't you been through enough?"

Kyleigh smiled at him, though it was a somber smile. "You can't always protect me, Carlisle. At some point you need to let go."

"I promised I would be there for you for as long as we both lived, remember? That counts just as much now as it did then."

"Did you intend for me to live forever when you said that, though? Because neither of us saw this coming." Kyleigh picked at a stray thread on her pants.

"I didn't know at the time that you would become a vampire, no, but I made a promise and I'm going to hold true to that."

Kyleigh avoided eye contact as she repeated her sentiment from earlier, "Forever is a long time."

She heard her doctor stand up, moving around his desk so he was standing next to her. Still, she didn't look at him, even as he crouched down in front of her.

"What are we really talking about, Ky?"

She finally met his eye, no longer smiling. "Whatever you want us to talk about."

He took one of her hands in his. "Just drop it. Go someplace fun with Jasper. You're always welcome to visit the island, or you can go up to your cabin in the mountains. Just get out of here and clear your head."

Kyleigh looked at their entwined hands, at the Cullen crest engraved on his ring, matching her locket. "You know me, once I start something, I can't really be stopped."

He laughed softly. "I know that all too well." He squeezed her hand as he stood back up. "As always, follow your heart, Ky. If you think this is really what you need, I won't stand in your way."

"Thank you, Carlisle. You've always been too nice to me." She too stood up.

"Kyleigh," he said, just before she walked out of his office.

"Yeah?"

"Have you considered drawing anything? It's been awhile since you've created something, I'm wondering if that might help."

"You always suggest that when things get tough." She laughed. "Art isn't always the answer."

"But it certainly helps."

She turned, looking up at the painting she'd done for him as a Christmas present all those years ago. The never-ending sunrise to sunset cycle meant a lot more to her now. Who knew that eight years later, she would be living in that infinity?

"I'll think about it."

"That's all I ask," he said, as she closed the door behind her.


	2. I don't want to be found

Kyleigh came home from hunting with Emmett the following afternoon to find a note on her bed:

 _I called Maxwell first thing this morning. He said he will see what he can do, but that those records are supposed to be sealed. He gave me a list of private investigators to contact. Be careful with how you proceed. I highly doubt I need to remind you that you're dead._

 _Love,_

 _Carlisle_

"Ooh, 'love,'" Emmett teased.

Kyleigh shoved him lightly, though this had no impact on his large frame. "Don't be jealous, Emmett."

"Why would I be jealous? I have Rosalie. That's the definition of winning." He winked at Kyleigh, who pretended to gag.

They made to walk through the door into the kitchen at the same time, getting stuck in the doorway.

"Move, Emmett, whatever happened to ladies first?" Kyleigh asked, shoving against him again.

"I don't see any ladies around here, just an annoying girl," he replied, shoving back.

"Take that back!"

"Never!"

Kyleigh and Emmett fell to the floor with a loud crash, leaving a small dent on the floor.

"Would you two stop?" Esme cried, running in from the living room.

The two paused in their wrestling to look up at her, apologizing at the same time.

"We'll fix the floor, Esme, we promise," Kyleigh said as she clambered back to her feet.

"Total accident, Esme," Emmett added.

The woman merely glared at them before going back into the living room.

"That was your fault, by the way," Kyleigh told him as soon as Esme was out of earshot.

"Nope, definitely your fault," Emmett replied.

Rather than argue, Kyleigh headed upstairs, looking for Jasper. She found the blond sitting on a chair by the window, looking out into the woods. "Nicely done. I bet the neighbors heard that bang," he said without turning around.

"It was Emmett's fault," she said quickly.

Jasper grinned, pulling Kyleigh onto his lap as soon as she was within arm's reach. "I'm sure it was." He buried his face in her hair. Automatically, Kyleigh wrapped her arms around him.

"So, Carlisle talked to Maxwell. He said he'd do what he could, but I think we're gonna have to hire a PI." She handed Jasper the list of private investigators, keeping Carlisle's actual note tucked in her pocket.

"I thought that might happen." Jasper gave the list back. "So are we doing this?"

"Of course we are! What else is there to do?" Kyleigh responded.

"You could go to college, now that you have your high school degree. Or we could go on a vacation," Jasper suggested lightly.

"Technically we are going on a trip. I bet we'll have to travel around to find her. And I have the rest of my life to go to college. Why rush?"

Jasper looked at her dubiously. "I think if we use a PI, he'll do all the work."

"I want to be a part of it," she insisted. "You don't have to come with me, you know? If you don't want to waste your time, feel free to go on a trip or go get another degree." She made to stand up, but he held onto her.

"That's not what I said. I'll go with you."

"Fine. Good." Kyleigh smiled at him. "I'm going to go call these guys and see who's free."

As soon as Jasper's grip loosened, Kyleigh jumped to her feet, zooming out the door. She shook off the guilt that had bloomed in her stomach upon seeing Jasper's face. This was her battle to fight after all.

Kyleigh spent the rest of the week working her way down the list of PIs Maxwell had recommended. Most either laughed at her or quoted her ridiculous prices. She crumbled up the paper and threw it at the wall, though this did little to ease her frustration. Come Friday, she had practically abandoned the plan all together, instead choosing to play chess with Rosalie. Emmett sat on the floor next to them, refereeing.

"Ooh, this is a risky move on Kyleigh's part. Can she do it? Can she do it?! Oh, she did it! Now it's up to Rosalie to overthrow her. Wait, no, babe that's a bad move, don't do it."

Rosalie and Kyleigh glared at him.

"You're supposed to be refereeing, not advising," Kyleigh said.

"I am. This is what refs do!"

"No, this is what announcing sports announcers do, and the players usually can't hear them," Rosalie said though she didn't break her concentration.

"I'm…announcereeing then." Emmett leaned back on his hands. "Carry on then, make your move, Rose."

Just as Rosalie was about to make her ("totally worthless, really don't do it") move, Jasper came in. One look at his face froze the three of them.

"Hi Jas," Kyleigh greeting, hoping he wasn't as angry as he looked.

"Kyleigh, can I talk to you?" When he got angry, his Southern accident become more prominent, which Kyleigh usually found sexy, but today only found it terrifying.

"Emmett, take over for me," Kyleigh said as she stood up, following her husband into the sitting room.

Jasper sat down on the couch, gesturing for Kyleigh to do so as well. As soon as her butt hit the cushion, Jasper started talking:

"So, something interesting just happened to me. I found that list of PIs you'd been going through and saw you'd missed one. In an attempt to make it up to you, I decided I would give him a call to get a quote from him. Imagine my surprise when I gave him your name and information and he remembered you. He said that he'd helped you several years ago when you were trying to find your parents. He passes on condolences, by the way." Jasper paused for a moment, but Kyleigh knew better than to interrupt. "He says that he can give it another shot, but since he couldn't find your parents the first time around, finding your hypothetical birth mother might be impossible."

Kyleigh bit her lip, not sure what to say. Thankfully, Jasper wasn't done yet.

"Is this what you did that last year before I met you? Did you use a PI to try to find your parents then too?"

"I did, but can you blame me for wanting to try? I thought I was going to die, Jas. I wanted to find them."

"And you nearly killed yourself in the process!" Jasper paced the room, looking more frustrated than Kyleigh had ever seen him.

"Yeah, well the point is I didn't die. Plus I didn't even know you. Why is this an issue?"

"It's an issue because you've kept it a secret for so long. The point of a marriage is not keeping secrets."

"This happened long before we were married, and you've never asked me about it."

"I assumed that you would tell me someday. It's been five years, Ky. Were you ever planning on telling me where you went that year?"

The honest answer was no, and Kyleigh could see from the look in his eyes that Jasper also realized this. "I'm sorry, Jas, I really am. It's not something I like to talk about. You know that already."

"Have you told Carlisle?" His eyes were smoldering as they looked at her.

"No!" Kyleigh threw up her hands in exasperation. "I haven't told anyone! What is with you and the Carlisle thing lately?"

A tick worked in her husband's jaw. "You look at him the way you used to look at me. Don't deny it."

"But I married you." Kyleigh walked to him, holding out her hands.

"Because Carlisle was taken?" Jasper ignored her outstretched hands.

"Because I love you. Please, believe me, Jasper. I love you." If Kyleigh could cry, she probably would be by now.

Jasper didn't say anything, instead just handing her back the list of PIs and walking out of the room.

Kyleigh avoided her family for the rest of the day. For the first time since becoming a vampire, she dug out her old art kit and some drawing paper. At first she just traced doodles and swirls over the paper, not sure what to draw. Soon, though, she was sketching the outlines of thick, leafy trees, layering them over and over, leaving only room for a small pathway in the middle. She grabbed a brown pencil, using it to fill in the trees, trying her hardest to recapture their beauty.

Once she was done, she held it up, inspecting it. Though several years had passed by, she could still smell the fresh earthy scent that had permeated the redwood forest. Looking closely at the picture brought back memories of her standing in the middle of a clearing, staring up at the canopies of the trees, imagining what the sky looked like. The feeling of her mortality, brought on by the overwhelming sense of life within the forest, hit her hard. It was that day in the forest that made her realize how small and insignificant she was to this world.

She set aside the drawing, grabbing another piece of paper, and starting a new sketch, this time using various shades of blue and green in an attempt to recapture the beauty of Bodega Bay. Since she visited there in November, there wasn't much vegetation around her, but she could see a few whales off in the distance. Kyleigh knew there was no way her pencils would ever be able to convey the exhilaration she felt, standing on the edge of the cliff. Though she usually got vertigo if she stood on anything higher than thirty feet, she only felt comforted by the distance between her and the water far below. She had actually considered jumping at one point, just to end it all in a beautiful place. She barely had time to look at her drawing of the cliffs and the sea before seizing another page.

Her hands could barely keep up with the memories bombarding her: sleeping in Yosemite National Park under the most beautiful blanket of stars she had ever seen. Traveling all the way to Napa Valley to smell the grapes in the vineyards, though she hated the taste of wine. Endless hours of driving around the northwest, exploring everything she could before the end. Hours later, she sat in the middle of the room, surrounded by hastily drawn sceneries, merely snippets of the memories she had tried so hard to suppress.

"Are you ready to talk now?" came a voice from behind her.

"That depends. Do you want to go on a road trip?" Kyleigh responded.

Jasper began scooping up her drawings, putting them in a neat stack and handing them to her. "I think I could spare some time."

The map Kyleigh had bought from the local convenience store was almost as large as she was. With the help of Jasper, they managed to spread it out across the Cullen's never-used dining room table.

"Okay, the route I went wasn't really a direct shot to anything," Kyleigh started, wielding a pen to start marking her original journey. "I was mostly flying blind at the time."

"Right." Jasper held the map down taut so Kyleigh could draw on it easier. He watched her trace from Portland to Seattle down to different parts of California. "Why did you go to these places?"

"They were on a list of one hundred things to do before you die." She capped the pen she was using then switched to a different color. "Maybe we should make a new book: One Hundred Things To Do After You Die."

"How macabre," he said with a smile.

Though there was still tension in the air from the fight a few days previous, Kyleigh and Jasper had yet again reached a truce.

"So, which way should we go?" Kyleigh asked, looking at him expectantly, the pen poised over the map.

"Shouldn't we wait for that guy's instructions on where to go?"

Kyleigh shrugged. "We could, but I'd like to get moving at least. Take my mind off it for a little while. Have you ever seen the redwood trees?"

"Nope, can't say I have."

He laughed at her pained expression.

"What the heck have you done with your afterlife? I feel like all you guys do is sit around and mope. You need to explore! See the world!"

"Hard to do that when we sparkle in the sunlight, Kyleigh," Carlisle said. Neither had notice him come into the room.

"That's why you do it all at night. It's even better: no lines."

"Ah," Jasper and Carlisle said at the same time.

"So yeah," Kyleigh broke off a little awkwardly. "We can go wherever you want."

"You should just go to your old house," Emmett said, also appearing in the doorway.

"And do what, exactly?" Kyleigh asked.

"See if they still live there. If they do, go knock on their door, and be like 'ooh, I'm a spooky ghost, take me to my mother, ooh!'"

The other three turned away from him.

"Wait, no, seriously, go see if they still live there. Have Jasper talk to the neighbors to see what your parents have been up to. Maybe they know where they've gone." Emmett shrugged. "Just a suggestion."

"That's actually not a bad idea," Carlisle said. "Excluding the spooky ghost aspect." He smiled as he said this.

"You have to admit, it would be hilarious," Emmett said, grinning back.

"What would be hilarious?" Esme asked.

"If Kyleigh went to her old house, knocked on her parents' door, and told them she was a spooky ghost," Jasper explained.

Esme giggled. "I think that's a fine plan."

"Thank you!" Emmett said, high fiving Esme.

"Did I miss some sort of invite?" Rosalie pushed her way through into the room.

Kyleigh and Jasper gathered up the map.

"Nope, no invite. Just a brainstorming session of sorts," Kyleigh told her. "We're figuring out our plan."

"I thought we figured it out already," Emmett called over the small crowd.

"Yeah, but then what?" Jasper asked.

"Oh, right."

They all thought hard.

"I say wing it," Rosalie said, breaking the silence. "Cause really, there is no planning for this. You'll have what's his face as a guide, and everything will be fine, right?"

Jasper and Kyleigh looked at each other then nodded.

"Yeah, planning has never really worked out for me anyway." Kyleigh laughed. "Alright, guess we should go pack, right Jas?"

"I guess so."

Jasper hit Kyleigh lightly in the back, making her squeal. She chased him out of the room, laughing too hard to hear whatever Carlisle said as they left.

Just after sunset that Sunday night, Jasper and Kyleigh finished loading up the car. Jasper ran back inside to get the last of their things while Kyleigh settled into the car, prepared for a long drive.

"Kyleigh," Carlisle greeted. "Ready to go?"

"As soon as Jasper gets back." She flipped her visor back up. "Come to say goodbye?"

"Don't I always?" He held out his arms to her, pulling her into a quick hug. "Stay safe, little one."

"Please, Carlisle, chill out. I'll be back for Christmas, like I always am," she teased, though she returned his hug. "And we'll keep you posted as we go along. I think this will be good for us."

"Me too." He pinned her down with his gaze for a moment. "Good luck," he repeated.

"Thanks," Kyleigh said, feeling flustered. She didn't turn around, though she heard Carlisle say bye to Jasper as well.

"Ready, darling?" Jasper asked.

"Born that way, dear," Kyleigh replied.

"I'm not sure we're going the right way," Jasper said an hour later.

"Of course we are, why wouldn't we be?"

"The sign we just past said we're heading south, not north.

"That's cause we're going south, not north," Kyleigh replied. She did her standard look at the rearview mirror, check both side view mirrors, then look at the road routine.

"Oh," Jasper said. "We are?"

"Yup. You said you wanted to know what I did that year I went missing? I'm going to show you."

"You are?" he asked, surprised.

"Yeah. Why not, right? You're right, it's time I told someone about it, and it makes the most sense for me to tell you." She glanced at him and smiled.

Jasper stayed quiet for a few minutes. "Are you going to actually tell me where we're going first?"

"I won't say it out loud, but if you really want to know, I drew them all out and they're in a folder in the backseat." Kyleigh expected him to grab the folder, but he didn't, just nodded.

"I thought you didn't do art anymore," he said to break the comfortable silence.

"I also realized that art is one of the few things I'm really good at. Don't tell me I'm good at other things," she cut him off. "I know there are other things I can do, but art is the one thing I carried over from my life that I can do. Even if I feel that it's only gotten me into trouble."

"I don't know about that, Ky. It made you happy, didn't it?"

"It did, but drawing for that project in high school made me friends with Bethany, who stabbed me in the back. Then taking that art camp and going into that gallery killed my foster parents. I don't know, I just feel like art always led me into some sort of trouble. Even if it did save me."

"How did it save you?"

These were all things Kyleigh had briefly talked about over the years, but hadn't brought up herself.

"You'll see, Tex, all in good time." She reached over and squeezed his hand lightly. "Just wait."


	3. Let's get away now

Kyleigh parked down a rather desolate side street a few hours later. "Do you trust me?" she asked him.

"Of course," he said automatically.

"Okay, follow me then."

They got out of the car, walking quietly up the street, turning onto a nice street with big houses. In the distance, Kyleigh saw the familiar mountains that had served as the backdrop to her early high school years. Kyleigh took Jasper's hand, leading him down a long driveway, towards a large house made of wood and stone.

"Hold up," Jasper said, pausing in the middle of the driveway. "Was this your foster home?"

"It was," she said quietly. "I came back here first, kind of stupidly. It's not like I'd been gone that long, and it really tore me up inside, but I felt like I had to come back here before going anywhere else, as like, one last reminder of where I'd been or whatever."

Kyleigh pressed a finger to her lips, gently tugging him along. There were no cars in the driveway. Kyleigh crept up to the garage to peak in the windows; no cars there either.

"Come on," she whispered, going to the front door.

"You can't be serious, Ky, we aren't breaking into a house," Jasper hissed at her.

"Technically it was my house once," she said over her shoulder.

"Years ago!"

She ignored him, instead using a hairpin to click the door open. Thankfully, and conveniently for her, the new owners didn't have an alarm set up. She stepped inside, careful not to leave any footprints.

"Fine, stay as look out if it makes you feel better," she said to him. "I just need to do this."

Kyleigh smiled a little when she heard Jasper follow her into the house, knowing how much it went against his better judgment. The new owners hadn't changed much. Obviously there was new furniture and different pictures, showing a mom and dad and two kids, a boy and a girl. The most generic family you could possibly imagine. Kyleigh flew up the stairs, silent as only a vampire could be. The little boy inhabited her old room. Gone were the pretty purple walls, replaced with dark blue paint, hidden under dozens of posters: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Spiderman, Batman, Superman, too many heroes. Kyleigh spun in a slow circle, her eyes closed, remembering all the nights she'd spent here, most with her feeling sick.

The bathroom was cluttered with kids' toothbrushes and toothpaste. A small stool leaned against the counter, so the little kids could reach the sink. Kyleigh was glad to see the bathroom without dozens of pill bottles and other hospital paraphernalia everywhere. They'd renovated a little bit: they'd added a bathtub in the corner. Kyleigh wished she'd had one of those when she lived here.

Kyleigh continued padding around the house, peeking in the other rooms, but not going in. She went back down the stairs, heading for the back deck. The new owners had put a grill out there, as well as some fancy deck furniture. From what Kyleigh gathered, Lisa and Ryan rarely, if ever, went out on the deck. They preferred to admire their expansive view of the thick woods behind their house from the safety of their home.

They had renovated the kitchen as well, removing the breakfast bar and island, making it one open space. From the ceiling, pretty lanterns hung, though they were more for decoration than anything else. She flipped the switch quickly, noting the dim light they provided.

"These people might be wealthier than Lisa and Ryan. Look at all the stained glass they've added." Kyleigh pointed around the kitchen and living room.

"Or they just like stained glass."

"I guess. It reminds me of church though. Kind of creepy."

Though Kyleigh knew children lived here, there was little evidence of them downstairs. Everything sparkled as only a thoroughly Lysoled home could. Kyleigh's imagination ran from her for a moment, as she pictured two wicked parents locking their kids in their rooms, only letting them out when guests were over to prove they even had children.

"Kyleigh," Jasper said behind her. "Let's go."

She turned to him, her golden eyes bright. "Okay. Everything has changed."

"Did you really expect it to be the same?"

Jasper wrapped an arm around her, guiding her out the front door.

"No, and I'm glad it's not."

They walked back to the car in silence, though Jasper looked surprised when Kyleigh unlocked it, crawled into the backseat, and slid back out holding her folder.

"Come on, the river isn't too far away."

She clutched the folder to her chest. Jasper obediently followed her through the paths in the woods. Her throat was too full to speak yet, but Jasper understood. He'd always understood.

The river flowed in front of the, wide and lapping gently on the muddy shore. Kyleigh sat down on the damp grass, pulling out a blank piece of paper and a pencil. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Jasper stroll along the river's bank, and felt grateful for the privacy. She needed to capture the river, just one more time.

She had no idea how long she sat on the ground, looking between the sight in front of her and her sketchpad. It was getting dark when she finally got to her feet. Jasper reappeared by her side as soon as she was upright. She handed the new drawing to him so she could pull out the old drawing she had done so many years ago. They held them up, side by side.

The old one had color in it, all green and bright. She only had a graphite pencil for the new one, though she'd tried her hardest to bring the fall to life.

"It's beautiful, Kyleigh," Jasper said.

"Look how it's changed," she said with a laugh. "Though I came here in spring, when everything was starting to bloom. Now everything is just starting to fade."

"There's probably some sort of symbolism there," he teased.

"Or just the timing of my whimsy," she responded. "Anyway, now you know where it all started. Right here, at the river. The first drawing I did on the trip."

"Okay."

She knew her husband well enough to tell that he had no idea what else to say, or even what to think, but she knew that he still loved her enough to go along with it. God bless him.

"We aren't going to the hospital next, are we?" he asked after they'd gotten into the car, a look of horror on his face.

"Nope." Kyleigh buckled her seatbelt.

"I think you should go to all of your old haunts, and do the spooky ghost thing."

Kyleigh looked over at him in shock, then realized he was joking. She stifled her laughter with her hand.

"I think you'd make a better spooky ghost than me."

"You're just saying that cause I'm pale." He shook his head, pretending to be offended.

"We're all pale," she reminded him. "You just look extra vampire-y to me."

"Thanks?"

She laughed. "Anyway, I think we can both agree, going to the hospital is a bad idea."

"Nope, not at all. Well, where to next then?"

Kyleigh and Jasper pulled out the map, though it was quite difficult to unfold it. Eventually, Kyleigh spread it out over Jasper's head.

"Try not to move."

"Oh, okay," he replied, his voice muffled.

"I think I know where I'm going," she said, after a few minutes of pretending to know how to read the map.

"Ky?" Jasper asked.

"Yes?"

"If you're just taking me through the path you already did, why are you looking at a map?"

Kyleigh pulled the map back over his head, folding it up, albeit very messily.

"Cause you have to use a map on a road trip," she said in her best 'duh' voice.

"Did you use one on your first trip?"

"Yup! But I mostly relied on a GPS. It was really just for show. It makes everything more authentic!"

"Okay, okay, we'll use the map, jeez." He held up his hands in surrender. "Where to next?"

"You'll see."

"Eureka? Seriously?" Jasper asked six hours later.

"What do you have against Eureka?" she asked, getting out of the car and stretching.

"Nothing, but what brought you here?"

"It's called _Eureka._ I had to come here!"

Kyleigh grabbed her sketchbook and her drawing out of the folder.

"Of course," he replied, in a tone that clearly implied he didn't understand.

"Just hush, don't question. If you don't question, it makes perfect sense," she said soothingly.

They linked arms, walking towards the waterfront.

"Okay, so aside from the fact that it's called Eureka, any other reason you came here?"

Kyleigh just shook her head. Looking out at the boats floating nearby was bringing her back to when she was seventeen, and feeling so lost and confused.

By the time she had reached Eureka, she had felt awful. She had the chills, but she didn't think it had anything to do with the April breeze. She burrowed into her NorthFace jacket, shivering violently. Couples holding hands passed her by, enjoying the quickly approaching sunset. Out on the water, early season fishermen yelled to each other, tossing ropes to the people waiting on the docks.

Kyleigh shuffled her way towards the edge of the road, right to where the chains stretched across the boardwalk, creating a makeshift fence. She kicked at it lightly, watching it sway in her feverish state.

"Are you okay, honey?"

She looked over her shoulder. A little old couple stood behind her, slightly stooped towards each other, like they had been together forever.

"You're shaking, love," the old woman said.

"Oh, I'm fine," she lied automatically.

"Right. Why don't you let us buy you something to eat?" the man offered. "We were just on our way to the diner up the street. We'll buy you a sandwich."

Kyleigh fought a brief internal debate. "Sure," she said, after thinking it through. Free food was the best food.

She fell into step with the old couple, who introduced themselves as Frank and Claire. They'd been married for over fifty years, had five children, ten grandchildren, and possibly some great grand children. Kyleigh lost track of the conversation, only saying that her name was Carly. The hostess recognized Frank and Claire, who went to a booth by the window so surely that Kyleigh knew they came here at least once a week, probably for the last fifty years.

"Order whatever you'd like, dear," Claire told her.

Though the couple shed theirs, Kyleigh kept her coat and hat on. The waitress came by, not even asking Frank or Claire what they wanted. Kyleigh ordered a cup of tomato soup, a grilled cheese sandwich, and a cup of tea.

"Poor thing, you're shaking so hard. I think you have a fever." Claire reached across the table, feeling Kyleigh's forehead. "You're burning up! We should get you to a doctor."

"No, it's okay," Kyleigh said quickly. "I already saw a doctor. I have medicine, I'm just waiting for it to kick in." Not a total lie, so she didn't feel guilty.

Claire didn't look like she believed her, but Frank asked Kyleigh where she was from, thankfully changing the subject.

"Seattle. Just going on a quick trip." She didn't want them to think she was a runaway, in case they decided to do something dumb like call the police.

"Your parents know where you are?" Frank pressed.

"Yup. I'm heading for my aunt and uncle's house, it's okay." She'd have to start keeping track of her lies.

"How old are you, Carly?" Claire asked.

"Eighteen."

The food arrived before the couple had a chance to ask anything else. Kyleigh had to force herself not to inhale her food, though she was starving. She cleared her plate, her bowl, and her cup. The waitress came over to refill her tea twice.

"I think dessert is in order," Frank said with a laugh.

"No really, it's fine." Kyleigh had to save her money.

"Please, dear, it's on us. It doesn't look like you've eaten in days."

 _Very observant,_ Kyleigh thought. "What do you recommend then?"

"Well, we always split the cherry pie. If you don't like cherries, though, their apple pie is to die for."

They placed their dessert orders, which left time for Claire and Frank to ask her more questions that she successfully lied about or evaded. Night had completely fallen when they finished their meals.

"Where are you staying tonight, Carly?" Frank asked her.

Kyleigh smiled, watching him help his wife into her coat. Too bad she wouldn't live long enough to have a marriage like that.

"Ky? Earth to Kyleigh?" Jasper waved his hand in front of her face.

"Greetings, earthling," she said, focusing on him.

"Where to?"

She looked around, realizing she'd led him exactly to the spot where she'd met Claire and Frank.

"When I came here last, I went to this diner down the street. We could go but…"

"We can't eat," he finished. "Speaking of which, later we should probably go out for dinner." He winked, making her laugh.

"Okay, let's at least walk past it."

They linked arms again, while Kyleigh recounted the diner story to him.

"So what did you do? Did you go home with them?" he asked. They were standing in front of the diner. Kyleigh half-expected to see Frank and Claire there, but it was almost empty, just a few fishermen, and a young girl, probably also a runaway.

"Nope. They were nice, but I'd seen enough episodes of _Criminal Minds_ to know never to go home with strangers. Well, except for you."

"We weren't really strangers. You knew Carlisle." His voice went slightly cold.

"True, but just the same, you were the weirdo rude stranger who yelled at me on the first day," she teased, lightening the mood.

"Well, I think my southern charm won in the end."

"Or I was just that desperate to get out of the hospital."

"Oh you." He seized her around the waist, lifting her up and spinning her until she was begging him to stop. Passersby had paused, some smiling, others looking disgusted at them.

"Anyway," she said, as though he hadn't just pounced on her. "I said I had a place to stay, and Frank slipped me a few twenties, so I found this kind of sketch motel. Ooh, let's go there!"

"Oh boy," he said flatly, though he let her take his hand.

It looked just as rundown as it had all those years ago. The door swung open, and Kyleigh smelled the combination of disinfectant and must. Her room had smelled the same way, if not worse. The scratchy pillows had left a minor rash on her face, but sleeping on a bed instead of in her car felt heavenly. The walls had been thin though, and she'd pressed her chair against the door, just in case the seedy guy at the front desk decided to do something weird.

"You stayed here?" Jasper asked, looking mildly disgusted. "You were probably just as likely to get murdered here."

"True, but it meant less questions asked." Kyleigh looked up at the faded motel sign.

"Were you scared they'd call the police?"

"I was scared they didn't believe my story of being an eighteen year old going to visit her aunt and uncle. If they'd called the police, I would've just gone back to Carlisle and it wouldn't have been a big deal."

"Right. So, are you going to draw the motel?"

"I actually did the original drawing from the motel window, so…"

"So, we're getting a room for the night?" Jasper looked up at the faded sign as well.

"We don't have to, it would just be more authentic." She gave him the puppy dog eyes.

"Okay, okay, let's go."

"You were in multiple armies and have done lots of not so glamorous things. How can this possibly bother you?" she whispered.

They waited until after they'd rented a room for the night and gotten to it before Jasper informed her that it was the thought of her staying in this "decrepit, gruesome" place alone.

"Ah, my knight in shining armor. Or shining skin, I should say."

He growled at her, crouching down. Kyleigh immediately went on the defensive, prepared to pounce. He moved fast, but she moved faster, ducking under his outstretched arms, doing a nimble backflip and landing on his shoulders, her arms wrapped around his neck. He grabbed her leg, tugging her over his head, tossing her onto the bed. She rebounded quickly, catching him off guard and slamming him into the wall, leaving it a little worse for wear.

"Oops." She giggled.

"Well, probably no worse than what other people have done." He winked at her.

"Perhaps we should save the rough housing for a sturdier home."

"Oh really?" He cocked a brow at her. "You sure about that?"

He pulled her close to him, walking backwards until he hit the bed, dragging her down on top of him.

"Well, maybe not. We'll just need to be gentle."

He grazed his teeth against her throat. "I can do that."

He moved over her and she shut her eyes, sighing deeply.

At quarter past six that morning, Kyleigh uncoiled herself from Jasper's embrace, heading over to the window. She slid it open, allowing a cool breeze to tickle her face, blowing her hair back over her shoulders. She pulled a chair over, perching herself on it, and looking out at the sunrise. It didn't matter what time of year it was, sunrises pretty much always looked the same to Kyleigh: some pink here, a dash of orange and red there, an orb placed majestically in the middle. This morning, though, everything looked a little more beautiful.

Kyleigh looked down at her old drawing. Almost everything was the same, the sun, the boats, the sparkle on the water, but the old picture seemed so dull in comparison.

Her head had been killing her when she'd woken up the next day in the motel room, her mouth thick and dry. She couldn't remember where she was for a moment and sat up in a panic. "Carlisle?" she had called automatically then blushed. Modern day Kyleigh would have blushed if she had blood. Of course she had called his name, even though she was the one who ran away from him.

Despite her sore throat and fever, Kyleigh dragged herself out of the horribly uncomfortable bed, going straight for the window. At that early hour, the fishermen were already loading up their boats, gearing up for a day of work. The sun had risen when Kyleigh finally finished her drawing.

Present day Kyleigh blinked in the sun. "Crap," she muttered. "Jas?"

"What?"

She turned, watching her husband sit up on the bed, his blonde hair tousled.

"The sun is up."

"The sky is blue," he sang.

"It's beautiful, and so are you," she finished automatically. "No wait, the sun is up. We can't leave."

He lay back down, not looking concerned. "That's okay."

"We're suck here all day," she said slowly.

"That's okay," he repeated slowly. "Come back to bed, darling." He held out his arms, waiting.

Kyleigh set her drawings aside. "I suppose it's not a big deal to stay in bed all day."

He grinned his lazy grin, then grunted as she threw herself on top of him.

"It's kind of like our honeymoon again," she said hours later.

"But better." He twirled a piece of hair between his long fingers.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, we know each other better now. We're more experienced."

She snorted with laughter. "Well, it's been five years, I would hope so. And just think, that's barely anything in comparison to the whole living forever thing."

"That's true." He tugged at her hair, like it was a bell. "Forever is a long time, isn't it?"

"It is, and my forever has barely started." She sat up slowly. "I'm sorry."

"What for, doll?"

"For not being a good…wife, I guess." She ran her fingers through her hair, agitated.

"Kyleigh, it's fine, it's not about that." He also sat up. "It isn't about being a good or bad wife. This isn't the 1950's, hon."

"Then what's it about?" She looked out the window. The sun had started to set.

"Trust. Patience. Love." He stroked her hair. "It's not about the labels, it's about living, so to speak."

"You're right," she murmured.

"If I had a nickel for every time you said that-"

"You would be very poor."

They cracked up.

"But seriously, Jas, I'm sorry for not being good to you," she said, sobering.

"I am too. Now will you relax?" He pulled her back onto the bed. "Where to next?"

Kyleigh rolled away from him, fetching her folder.

"Ah yes, the plans," he said exaggeratingly.

"The plans, master, the plans," she said back. "Okay, next up is San Francisco. I'm hoping it'll stay overcast."

"Sun will be down soon and we can get going." She rubbed his arm lightly. "I think you'll like Frisco."

"Why's that?"

"I'm lying, I think you'll hate it." She giggled. "But I love it. It's…well, I'll explain when we get there."

"That sounds rather ominous, dear."

"Come on!" she said suddenly, sitting up and dragging him with her. "We should pack up. I'm excited for this!"

"Okay, okay, calm down."

After a quick shower and clothing change, they checked out of the motel. Darkness had completely fallen outside, and there was a chill in the air. Kyleigh spun in slow circles, Jasper following her, guarding her to keep her from getting run over.

"You don't need to watch me so closely, Tex," she said though her eyes were closed.

"Don't I?" He pulled her out of the street, narrowly saving her from a car.

"Okay, maybe you do." She fell against him lightly, feeling happier than she had in years. "That's the point of marriage, isn't it?"

"To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, till car accident do us part?"

Kyleigh bit her lip, the joy fading from her face.

"Oh, Ky, I'm sorry," he said quickly, "I wasn't thinking-"

"I know, I know. It's okay." She tried to laugh it off. "It was so long ago."

"Not that much, love." He squeezed her shoulders.

"I suppose not. Anyway, thanks for saving me."

He opened the door for her, allowing her to sit down before closing it. He helped her roll the map out, obediently pulling it over his head, making her laugh. She traced their route with a pen, mostly for show.

"Alright, ready?" she asked after they'd beaten the map back into the glove box.

"Born that way," he said teasingly.

"Alright, tally-ho then!"


	4. Chapter 4: and be careful not to crash

**Hello friends! As a bit of explanation, this story picks up five years post Kyleigh becoming a vampire. It doesn't go too much into the past five years in this story, mostly because Kyleigh was catching up on life (finishing high school, traveling a little bit, settling in as a vampire, as you do). Otherwise, I hope you're enjoying! I know Kyleigh isn't quite as zany as she was in Darling, You're Mean but she's grown a lot. I like to think she's still got that spark.**

 **Please, enjoy, review, message me. I like to know these things! :)**

Kyleigh parked the car in a shopping center's parking lot. They walked towards the woods, glancing around to make sure the coast was clear before running up the hill. Thanks to lightening speed, they cleared plenty of ground.

"Far enough, do you think?" Kyleigh called to her husband.

"A little farther, just in case," he said back.

They ran a few more miles, until everything around them was still.

"Okay, good." Jasper halted.

The pair stood in silence, allowing their sense to adjust to their surroundings. Kyleigh's ears were pricked, waiting. She took off without warning, the trees rushing past her. The deer didn't see it coming. Neither did the second deer, nor the bear. Kyleigh's exhilaration practically overwhelmed her. She met up with Jasper close to dawn. Their eyes had both turned back to liquid gold.

"Better?" she asked.

"Yup. You?"

"Definitely."

They joined hands, walking back through the woods as though they hadn't just destroyed a decent amount of the local wildlife. Daybreak had arrived over the parking lot. Jasper waited while Kyleigh grabbed her bag and sketches.

"Thank god for the clouds, right?" she asked, skipping along next to him.

"Definitely. Should we move the car?" He looked over his shoulder at it.

"Nah, it's fine. It says all day parking."

"Alright, just making sure. I'd really prefer not to go to the impound today."

"All part of the adventure!" Kyleigh felt so light, she thought she might drift away.

"Right," he said slowly. "So where are we going?"

She just smiled at him, leading him along.

Not even Carlisle knew how much Kyleigh loved the ocean. It didn't really make sense, considering she hadn't grown up at the beach, but she loved watching documentaries about otters and seals. She couldn't care less about the bridge or anything else when she arrived in San Francisco that spring morning. She just wanted to see the sea lions.

Much to the annoyance of the tourists around her, Kyleigh shoved her way through the crowd, set up her sketchpad, and drew out a picture of the sea lions lounging about on their docks. Pretty soon, though, she had attracted some attention. People were looking over her shoulders at her hands instead of at the real sea lions.

"Those are great," a man said.

"Thanks," she replied distractedly. She flipped to a new page, starting a close up of a fat seal.

"What's your rate?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" She leaned close to the paper, using the side of her pencil to shade in the harbor.

"How much would you charge for your last drawing, the one of the mom and baby seal?"

"Oh." She faltered, pausing her drawing. "Well. I don't really sell my art."

"Why not?" a woman asked.

Kyleigh started to feel claustrophobic with everyone pressing in around her.

"I'd pay twenty for that," she added.

Ginger's words rung in Kyleigh's ears: don't accept the first offer. To her surprise, the man said what Kyleigh had been thinking,

"I think it's worth more than twenty. Especially since we're watching her do it. I'd pay closer to forty."

Kyleigh turned. The man looked to be about forty himself, with salt and pepper hair and crinkly blue eyes. He smiled at her, and introduced himself as Bill.

Kyleigh avoided shaking his outstretched hand by clutching the notebook to her chest. She was already paranoid about catching pneumonia or something, she didn't need to willingly exchange germs with a stranger.

"Kyleigh," she said. If she decided to sell her art, she wanted to at least use her real name.

"Hi Kyleigh," he said, as though they were old friends. "What other drawings have you done?"

The crowd had stopped looking at the seals, instead watching her. Heat prickled at the back of her neck.

"Let's just start with this one." She gave him her most award winning smile.

Kyleigh made over a hundred dollars that day, most of it coming from Bill. She would've felt uncomfortable charging so much for her drawings if not for the fact that she was actively drawing pictures per request. She stayed at another motel that night, though one that was slightly less sketchy than the one in Eureka.

"I didn't know you sold your art," Jasper said.

"I had to. I was running low on money. It came down to sell my art or sell myself," she said, only half-joking. A fat sea lion, similar to the one she'd seen many years ago, rolled off the dock, splashing into the harbor. She moved fast, trying to capture the texture of the foam.

"Wow."

Kyleigh turned to him. He was looking at her instead of the sea lions.

"What? I needed to make money somehow."

"I guess I never thought about it that way." He shrugged.

"Did you only sell sea lions?"

"Of course not. I ended up staying in the NorCal area until almost September, so five months. It was one of the best times of my living existence." She faced the sea lions again, finishing off her drawing. "Anyway, I could stand here all day. Let's go check out some other parts of the pier. Maybe I'll take you into the Lefty store and you can get some left handed things."

"Wait, what?" he asked.

"I can't believe they make a store just for left handed people." He held two bags full of lefty paraphernalia.

"Well, if you think about it, pretty much every other store is for right handed people. It's only fair."

Kyleigh had to buy a new sketchpad by the end of the day when they grabbed the car and drove to a hotel. She threw herself down on the bed, bouncing happily.

"You really love it here, huh?" He crossed over, pulling open the shades to reveal a gorgeous view of the San Francisco city line.

"I do. I guess I never realized it before now though." She jumped off the bed so she could stand next to him, slipping an arm around his slim waist.

"Love it more than Portland?"

"I guess I do. Wow, look at all these realizations I'm having!" She laughed, but he didn't. "What? It's nothing against you!"

"I know that," he said, soothing her instantly. "It's just funny. Five years and it feels like I really don't know you."

"These are just parts of me, Jas, not everything. Don't worry about that. You've been around much longer than me, I'm sure there's a lot to you as well. And if there's not…well…that's just sad."

"Thanks, Ky." He shook his head at her. "Maybe you should sell some of the drawings you did today."

"I could," she said, thinking it over. "Maybe. I don't know. I don't really need to now."

"Maybe just for old time's sake?"

They fell back onto the bed together. Jasper flipped through the drawings, past all the seals, to the different angles of the pier.

"Well, how long do you want to stay here for? We're supposed to be looking for my parents."

"Are we, though?" His golden eyes met her matching ones, staring at her until she had to look away.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, right now we're learning so much about you, and it's only been a few days. Could this maybe be just about you?"

Kyleigh considered this. "I think that's kind of the same thing."

Jasper didn't seem to have a response, so instead asked if she'd heard from the detective yet.

Kyleigh pulled out her phone to double check. "Nope, nothing. Is he even working on it?"

Jasper shrugged. "Call him and ask?"

"Not yet. I'll give him another day or so."

"Fair enough. What's on for tomorrow?"

"Why should we wait until tomorrow?" Kyleigh teased. "We don't sleep, remember?"

"No good comes after midnight," he said.

"Jasper, we're vampires. We are, by definition, the 'no good that comes after midnight.'"

"Kyleigh," he paused, "you're right."

"Of course I am! Let's get changed, we're going for a walk."

"What kind of walk?" he asked warily.

"A romantic one. Wear comfy shoes."

By obligation, Kyleigh knew she had to see the Golden Gate Bridge, but she waited until July before getting on a tourist-y bus to ride across it. She had soon learned that summertime in San Francisco wasn't like summertime in other places. For her journey across the bridge, she wore jeans, a three-quarter length shirt, and her NorthFace, though that was partially because she was always cold.

As the bus flew across the bay, Kyleigh did some lazy sketches of the water and the bridge. She'd grown used to the gawkers, staring at her while she worked. There were so many artists in San Francisco, she had no idea why she was so popular. Before they'd even made it to Sausalito, she had offers to buy her bay drawings. She waited until the bus deposited them in the parking lot to exchange one of her pictures for twenty bucks. The kid who bought it barely looked older than her, though his scarce facial hair was clearly grown in an attempt to appear older.

She used the money to buy herself lunch at a waterfront restaurant. She was one of the few people willing to brave the wind on the back deck. To her shock, a sailboat zoomed straight up to the deck; a young couple docked there and a waiter helped them up into the restaurant.

"Crazy, right?" her lone diner said.

She nodded, her hand already flying across her pad. She'd never seen a sailboat up close before. The rope wrapped itself around the mast from the whipping wind. Kyleigh loved the red and blue stripes lining the body of it. She trotted over to the other side of the deck to get the back of the boat. _The Nan-sea._ Kyleigh laughed; how sweet.

Outside of the restaurant, a small, old man was crouched down in the rocks, stacking various rocks on top of each other. They were almost over his head. A small crowd had grown around him, but he paid them no mind. Kyleigh sat a little further away, doing a quick drawing of this as well, working hard to get the concentration on his face just right.

"I thought you'd be focusing on the stones, not the artist," someone with a southern accent drawled behind her.

She looked up. A man with a cowboy hat towered over her. A few feet away, a younger woman, also wearing a hat, stood, waiting.

"Anyone can draw rocks. He's more interesting," she explained. She turned back to her scene, resuming her work. Soon some people had moved over to watch her. She didn't get it: why did people like to watch her draw?

At one point, she looked up at the stone man and found him staring back at her. She could see the understanding reflected in his eyes, the weird side effects of creating art. Kyleigh had grown used to people offering money to her. She wondered if other artists had the same experiences, or if it was just because she was a young girl with a sad face that drew them in. The cow-family bought her first drawing, but she tuned out other offers, wanting to get a drawing just for herself, a memento for the day.

"It's nice to walk the bridge," she said to Jasper.

"You didn't cross the bridge before?"

"I never walked it. Too sick. I tried once and had the _worst_ coughing fit that a man had to carry me back to the mainland. It sucked, to say the least."

"Wow. I guess I never thought about that."

"About what?"

"You being sick like that."

"Yeah, you only saw the grand finale. You weren't there for the really good stuff."

Kyleigh and Jasper moved across the bridge silently. This late at night, there weren't many people around. They'd already argued about if vampires could cross running water (obviously they could), and what would happen if they jumped off (nothing, they'd just get wet).

"Did you go across often?" he asked when they were almost to the end of the bridge.

"Nope. I only went twice. It just didn't interest me. Too cold and windy."

"Pier 39 is cold and windy," he pointed out.

"I suppose. I guess bridges just aren't that important to me."

"How about right now?"

"In present company," she bumped against him, "it's not so bad."

"I feel special," he said, laughing.

"As you should!"

There were even fewer people in Sausalito. Kyleigh took Jasper to the restaurant she'd seen the sailboat at, though they had to sneak around to the back so she could show him the deck. He skipped rocks while she did a new drawing of it, having fun creating the stars, bright so far away from the city lights.

"Too bad that stone guy isn't here," she said later. It was nearing two a.m.

"Most people are probably sleeping. Even stone men."

"It would be really cool to do a second drawing of him though." She pouted.

"Maybe we can come back tomorrow and he'll be around." He patted her head lightly.

"Maybe. We could go on one of those tour bus things, if you really want to."

"I'd rather use you as my tour guide, Ky. Much more entertaining."

"And much sexier!" She winked roguishly.

"Oh yes, of course." He lifted her up lightly, spinning her around once. "Ready to go, Mrs. Montgomery-Whitlock-Hale?"

"Yes, Mr. Whitlock-Cullen-Hale. Aren't names fun?"

"The most fun!" he replied, imitating her voice. "Ow! Why'd you hit me?"

"Hitting can be fun," she said, shrugging.

"Let's go pretend to sleep, and then tomorrow we can go to Alcatraz, or Chinatown. Too bad we don't eat, there's a really good Chinese place there. There's a pretty park too! Or we could go on a cable car."

"Slow down there, we have plenty of time to do all of these things. Let's stay for a week. Would you like that?"

"I'd love that. Do you mean it?"

"Have I ever lied to you?"

She thought it over. "Nope, you haven't. Okay! But we need to get back on track at some point."

"Okay, fair enough."

Kyleigh had always been a little scared of hostels. She'd seen the movies, she knew what went down, but she needed a place to stay, and they were her cheapest option. No one questioned why she wore her mask at all times when she was inside, or the amount of pills she took twice a day. Kyleigh tried not to spend too much time inside anyway. She had better things to do.

"It's twenty-five for black and white, thirty-five for color, and the size of the drawing impacts it as well," Kyleigh told a slightly overweight, middle aged woman. "Trust me, you'll pay double that, or even more, at any of the gift shops around here."

"Well," the woman said, looking around a bit.

"And this is totally unique to you. Sure, I keep drawing the street, but each is different from the last." Kyleigh had become quite the saleswoman in her time in San Francisco.

"Well," the woman said again, "Okay, sure. But can I make a request?"

"Sure," Kyleigh said, already gearing up to draw.

"I'd really love if you could write Lombard Street somewhere on it. I know that's not up there, but if you could just add it, maybe at the top?"

"Of course!" Kyleigh leaned back against the cool wall of the building behind her, working her magic on the winding street. She loved drawing Lombard, with its zigzag angles and the pretty flowers. She'd even convinced the building owner to let her go to the roof one night so she could get a drawing of it in the evening. She'd had to train herself to work fast, though, in case her customer's patience ran out. Practice made perfect though, and fifteen minutes later, she handed the tourist her drawing, pocketing the money with her other hand.

At night, she had started another mosaic style painting of the street, which she didn't want to sell. The problem was travel. Once she decided to move on to wherever she wanted to go next, how would she transport her paintings? Kyleigh spotted a police officer heading towards the street corner, and hurriedly packed up her art supplies, blending into the crowd quickly.

Jasper sat patiently next to her, watching her do yet another drawing.

"Doesn't it get old? Drawing the same things?"

"Not really," Kyleigh said, not looking up from the paper. "Sure, it's the same backdrop, but it's always a little different, you know?" She put the pencil between her teeth so she could pull out one of her old drawings. "See? Different cars, different flowers, different vibe."

Jasper took it from her, examining it closely. "Different vibe?"

"I think my drawings are reflective of what's going on in my head space. See how there was a lot of fog in that picture?" She pointed to the old one. "Sure, it was a foggy day, but you could also say it was part of my foggy brain."

As the months passed, Kyleigh felt worse and worse. Towards the end of her stay in Frisco, there were days where she couldn't get out of bed. A couple in their early twenties had mercy on her and brought her food on the days when she felt too sick to move. Kyleigh told them it was just mono, now wanting to deal with any more stigma.

"Yeah," she said to Jasper. "Things got hard after awhile. I think my art suffered a little. Who wants to buy a drawing shrouded in misery?"

"True. Did your sales suffer?"

"Sort of." She flipped back to her new page. "Partially because it became harder to do so many drawings in a day. My focus was so off. It's razor sharp now though," she said with a wink.

"Ky?" he asked later, while they walked hand in hand through the streets.

"Yes?"

"Do you think you could do another painting like the one you did of Seattle?"

"Right now?"

They paused at a corner, waiting for a walking man. She didn't respond until the little guy appeared, signaling that they could move forward.

"It takes a lot of time and space to do that. I can probably do it when we go home, but not on the road, unless you want to stay here for a few weeks. I'd also need some sort of studio or enough space to do it."

"Okay, just asking." He laughed.

"Someday, my dear, someday."

Kyleigh was itching to paint as well, but she knew it wasn't the right time. Not yet.


	5. Chapter 5: Long drive

In the end, Kyleigh was the one who had to drag Jasper out of the city.

"We can come back any time, Jas!" she said. He jokingly pulled back, pretending to dig his feet into the ground. "It will be here later!"

"Not if The Big One happens," he protested.

This gave Kyleigh pause. "Okay, maybe, but we need to move on!" She tugged harder, almost falling over. He steadied her, teasing her for being a klutz.

"That wouldn't have happened if you'd just towed the line," she grumbled.

"Oh, you're fine."

The hotel valet pulled their car around. Jasper handed him some tip money and Kyleigh hopped in to the car. To Jasper's relief, Kyleigh did the ceremonious marking of the map up in the hotel room, saving him the trouble of playing hide and seek with it.

"I think you'll like the next place, it's gorgeous. We'll have to be careful though. It's pretty sunny."

"Do we really need to do this big surprise and reveal thing?" He reclined in his seat. Jasper didn't like riding in her cooper much; his legs were too long.

"Of course we do. What's the fun if I tell you where we're going?"

They timed it perfectly so that they arrived at their next destination right after the sun set.

"Okay, are you ready?" she asked, sounding excited.

"More than ready, my love."

He humored her, allowing her to walk him across some rough terrain, until she stopped suddenly.

"Okay, open your eyes!"

She watched him take in the view of Yosemite national park. Though it was dark out, Jasper's vampire vision honed in on the gorgeous reds, oranges, and yellows of the leaves surrounding the park.

"Wow," he murmured.

"Worth the element of surprise?" she asked teasingly.

"Definitely. I'll never doubt you again, dear."

"Glad we cleared that up!"

Kyleigh and Jasper pulled their car around to a cabin. She'd called ahead while Jasper was packing up their hotel to reserve a secluded temporary home for them.

"This whole road trip thing is _so_ much easier when you have money."

"You did pretty well for yourself though, all things considered." He pointed out.

She let him carry the bags up the stairs into the gorgeous wood cabin. Kyleigh ran straight for the back, pulling open the curtains so she could take in the view.

"The lady was right. This is a great cabin. Perfect for a honeymoon," she said coyly.

"I thought you wanted to go for a walk, Mrs. Whitlock-Hale." He came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"You skipped the Montgomery part," she teased. "And I do, but the night is young."

She reared around, jumping into his arms and catching him by surprise. They stumbled back until Jasper found the couch, then collapsed onto it together.

Hours later, Kyleigh and Jasper left their cabin, both grinning a little stupidly.

"This is a hell of a trip, Ky."

She skipped away from him, jumping up into a tree.

"Of course it is!" she called thirty feet over his head.

"Come back down, darling." He held his arms open for her, catching her. She expected him to put her down, but instead swung her around so he was giving her a piggyback through the woods.

The woods were quiet around them.

"What are you thinking about?" Jasper asked a little later.

"Just about how different my life turned out. I never thought I'd live past twenty."

"You weren't wrong," Jasper pointed out.

"No, that's true, but I didn't think I'd join the undead." She kicked him lightly. "The whole trip, I was waiting to die."

Jasper stayed quiet, waiting for her to continue.

"I kind of wanted to die here, where it was pretty. I came here around this time of year, you know? Fall was always my favorite season. Yet I didn't die. I couldn't let myself go like that, I guess."

"It's still a miracle you didn't die sooner."

"That's what Carlisle said one night, shortly before you guys took me home and changed me. People always like to say that though: 'oh it's a miracle that blah blah.' I don't think it was a miracle so much as a curse."

"Why a curse?"

Jasper paused in front of the river. Kyleigh climbed down to the ground, slipping off her shoes and stepping into the freezing water.

"Careful," he said behind her.

"Why? Scared I'll catch my death?"

He laughed, but she pulled off her jeans, stripped off her sweater and waded in. The water felt warm in comparison to her icy skin.

"You never answered my question," he said. He'd followed her into the water, probably scared she'd get eaten by a mountain shark or something.

"It's like I told you when we met: I was ready to die, Jasper. Being sick like that…being sick for so long, it's just awful." Her voice had faded to a whisper. "I know that the mentality I had wasn't great, and that plenty of people would have judged me for being a quitter if I'd told them, but it's true. I wasn't as strong as I seemed."

He massaged her shoulders lightly. "You're not a quitter, Ky. Not to me."

She smiled, turning to face him. "That's good to hear."

He lowered his mouth to hers, capturing her lips in his, kissing her slowly and sweetly. The water crested against their bodies, adding light background music for them.

"I love you, you know that?" Jasper asked, breaking the kiss.

"I know you do." She smiled again. "I love you too."

It had been awhile since they'd said those words and truly, sincerely meant them.

Sometime near sunrise, Kyleigh and Jasper headed back to their cabin so Kyleigh could get a good sketch in. Jasper disappeared upstairs to rinse the river water off, but Kyleigh changed her clothes and headed out to the back deck. The sun hit her exposed skin, making it sparkle. She spread out the colored pencils on the chair next to her, choosing the best shade of pink she could. Kyleigh lost herself in the shading and pretty colors. The golden in the leaves surrounding her matched the liquid gold of her eyes. The sun felt amazing on her skin, just as it had years ago, when she was contemplating suicide. There, she thought it, it was true.

No one knew it, but the thought had pressed against her, suffocating her, starting the night that Lisa and Ryan died. Kyleigh's note to Carlisle, left pinned to the back of his Christmas present one April morning, read as a general goodbye note, but she'd intended for it to be an eternal goodbye, stuck to the infinity of day and night she'd created, just for him.

During her stay in Yosemite, she stopped taking her medication, just as an experiment. To her horror, there was little impact: she felt just as sick off it as she had on it. In the tent she had spent a good portion of her savings on, Kyleigh would curl up every night, praying to go in her sleep. She cried every day when she woke up alive, telling herself they were tears of happiness.

"Kyleigh?" Jasper called. He slid the deck door open. "Hey, are you okay?"

"Fine, why?" She looked over her shoulder. He was wearing her favorite navy blue sweater.

"I could feel inner turmoil all the way from the shower. What's going on?"

"Just memories hitting me." She gave him a reassuring smile. "It's all good. I love that outfit on you."

"I know." He struck a dramatic pose. "I wore it just for you."

"Aw, how sweet."

Jasper picked up her sketchpad, admiring the sunrise she'd created.

"I'm not sure which is more beautiful: this drawing or you."

Kyleigh laughed. "Oh, and cheesy too!"

He shrugged. "Sometimes I like to consider myself a romantic."

"Okay, Fabio, whatever you say." She got to her feet, stretching widely. "Now what?"

"Whoever stayed here before left an interesting selection of movies. I saw _The Shining_ and _Cape Fear._ "

"Both such happy, go lucky movies!"

"I know, the happiest. Go wash the river off you and come back, quick like a bunny!" he ordered, in his best captain-lieutenant voice.

"Sir yes sir!" she yelled.

She came back down, her hair wet, wearing Jasper's green sweater.

"I picked _Cape Fear,_ " he said, not turning around.

"Is it the original or the remake?" She hopped over the back of the couch, bouncing on the cushions.

"Original. So, even better!"

He threw himself back down next to her. She crawled onto his lap, snuggling into his neck, making herself nice and cozy for a movie day.

Following the closing shot of _The Shining,_ Kyleigh shuddered. "God, that movie."

"What about it?"

"It's just so," she paused, thinking it over, "icky."

"It's one of the most popular modern movies. They've devoted full on documentaries to it, and all you have to say it it's 'icky?'"

"Sometimes the most popular movies aren't the best movies. _American Psycho_ is super popular and that's a terrible movie."

"I agree on that one. I hate that movie." Jasper flipped through some of the other DVDs. "These people seemed to focus on the creepy, not the Disney."

"Ooh," Kyleigh said, "what if they're murderers, hiding in the cabin, waiting to kill us in our sleep?"

"They'll be waiting a long time then." Jasper pulled out _The Cabin in the Woods_ , snorting at the obvious irony.

"Unless they're vamps too. Then what?" she persisted.

"Then we can probably take them." He popped the DVD in. "Calm down, love, you're going to upset yourself."

"I'm just saying, this is totally the plot of a horror movie."

"Fitting, considering we're monsters."

"I prefer to think of us like Batman: dark avengers," Kyleigh held up her hands like claws.

Jasper shook his head at her.

"That guy looks like Emmett," Kyleigh pointed out.

"Oh wow, you're right," Jasper said, starting to laugh. "He'll love that!"

"Yeah can't wait to tell him when we get back." Kyleigh giggled. "That just killed the movie. Now that's all I can think about."

"That's a shame. This isn't a bad movie."

"Look at you, horror movie connoisseur," she teased.

"I'm a man full of surprises." He puffed out his chest comically.

"That's true. Just think, I have an eternity to uncover them all."

"As do I."

"I only have nineteen years before I met you."

"This is true, but clearly there are things I don't know. Plus, we both know a woman's heart is a deep ocean of secrets."

"Do they have _Titanic_ here?! God, I love that movie!" she shrieked.

"Ow, Ky." Jasper covered his ears. "I doubt it. Doesn't seem to fit in with the general theme they have up here." At the look of disappointment on her face, he offered to go to the store to look for it.

"It's okay, we have too many other things to do. And I think we have five copies back at home."

"Maybe six."

"Not my fault I keep losing them." Kyleigh shrugged.

"Oh okay," he replied disbelievingly.

"Shh, just watch the movie," she said, turning his head back to the TV with her hand.

Jasper took her hand in his, rubbing her fingers.

"Where did you put your engagement ring?" he asked after the movie ended.

She looked down at her left hand, where a thin diamond encrusted band sat on her ring finger.

"Safe back at home. I thought it might raise a few questions when I was finishing high school, then I just got into the habit of wearing the wedding ring. I really don't want to lose it," she explained.

He nodded, looking thoughtful.

"Why? Does it bother you?"

"No, I just thought that maybe it was because of our relationship being so shaky."

"Well, maybe that too, to be honest, but mostly, I was just scared I'd lose it. It's not really replaceable. Your mom might come back from the grave and attack me," she joked.

She spun his wedding ring around his finger gently. "I always liked that you kept yours on though."

"A little bit more replaceable than yours."

"The sun will go down soon," she said a little awkwardly. "We can go for a walk if you want. Or go hunt, we haven't done that in awhile. We'll have to get off the Yosemite grounds though."

"Sure, we can do that."

They geared up and as soon as the sun disappeared behind the trees, shot out of the cabin far up into the forest.

Halfway through a rousing game of Scrabble, Kyleigh's cell phone started to ring.

"Hello?" she answered distractedly. Jasper was beating her and she was pissed off.

"Hi, is this Kyleigh?"

"Yup." She put down 'Quinoa' as a word, landing on a triple word score. Jasper rolled his eyes at her little victory dance.

"Hi, this is Eric, the detective. Remember me?" he said.

"Oh, hi Eric!" She sat up straighter. "How's it going?"

"Pretty good. I hear you're on a little road trip?"

"Yup, hoping to figure some stuff out before you do. Think of it like a race."

"Well, I'm winning then."

"Did you find my parents?" Kyleigh threw a letter at Jasper.

"Not yet, but I might have found your grandmother."

"I don't have a grandmother," she replied. "Well I mean, obviously I do, but I never knew her."

"She's still alive, living in a nursing home in Colorado."

"Colorado?" Kyleigh repeated. "Why Colorado?"

"Not sure yet, but I can give you her address if you want. Forewarning though: the nurses say she has dementia. Also, I told the nurses that I was your uncle, her son, just in case they ask."

Kyleigh grabbed a pen, copying down the address Eric gave her. With a quick thanks, she hung up. "I guess we're going to Colorado," she said to Jasper.


	6. Chapter 6: long night

Kyleigh sent Carlisle a quick text while they checked out of the cabin. Jasper and Kyleigh had argued after she got off the phone with Eric. He didn't think they needed to rush to Colorado, but Kyleigh had no idea when her grandmother would die. The sooner, the better.

 _How's it going?_ Carlisle texted.

 _Well! I think you were right, we needed the trip._

 _Very good. Get there safe._

 _Thanks. I miss you guys._

 _We miss you too, Ky._

Kyleigh put her phone away, helping Jasper load up the last of the stuff. "Ready?" she asked from behind the wheel.

"Go ahead."

Rather than talk, Jasper turned on the radio, tuning it to the country station. Kyleigh grimaced but didn't argue.

When they got out of range for that station and Jasper started fiddling with the radio again, Kyleigh turned down the volume on the static.

"Jasper, what's wrong?" she asked, the first words they'd exchanged since they'd left Yosemite. "You knew this was the point of the trip."

He sighed. "I know that."

"We can go back to Yosemite after, if you really want to see more of it," Kyleigh soothed.

"Kyleigh, that's not what's bothering me. I know we can go back. We can go anywhere at anytime."

"Okay, than why are you mad?" Kyleigh asked, growing frustrated.

"I'm trying to read your mind, and it isn't working."

"Well, let me tell you what I'm thinking then: I'm thinking that I don't want to spend my whole afterlife full of questions about my childhood. I don't want to go to school or go travel too far until I know what happened to me when I was a kid. How can I move forward if I don't know what happened in the past?"

"You can do it. The past isn't as important as you think. In a hundred years, it won't matter."

"Really? If you didn't have your history and your memories of it, you and your family would've been destroyed by that newborn army. If Esme didn't remember the grief of losing her baby, I doubt she would put as much effort into caring for all of us. If Carlisle didn't remember his humanity, he wouldn't be a doctor today. Everyone's past shapes their future. My past has so many holes in it, Jas."

Jasper stiffened as she listed his family members.

"Would you get over the Carlisle thing? I don't understand what happened to make you act this way."

"I may not be able to read minds like Edward, but I can read emotions, Kyleigh."

"Right, I know. It's one of your best and worst qualities." She tried to make light of the situation but Jasper didn't laugh. "How many times do I have to tell you I love you?"

"I know you do, but you love him too," he said quietly.

"Are you really jealous of him? In the big scheme of everything, that's what all of this is about?"

"I talked to Alice a few months ago, and she said she'd had some weird visions over the past year."

Kyleigh shook her head, trying to focus on not crashing the car. "And what did Alice have to say?" she asked, her teeth gritted.

"She said that she'd seen you and Carlisle together, alone."

"Jesus, Jasper, out with it. Stop the dramatic pauses and tell me."

"She said that both of your wedding rings were gone, it was just the two of you, and no you weren't kissing or anything, but you were standing close together."

"Is that why you asked me about my engagement ring? Because you thought I was trying to make myself available to Carlisle? You cannot be serious."

"The way you feel around him. Your mood lightens, your whole body lightens."

"Maybe because he's been much nicer to me than you have been lately. You'll probably find I feel that way around Emmett and Rosalie as well."

"Not Esme though. You've been avoiding her," Jasper pointed out.

Kyleigh faltered. It was partially true. "It's just because of the research I've been doing. It's bringing me back to when I was younger and Carlisle was the only person in the whole world who cared about me."

"Who loved you," he said quietly.

"Yes, but now I'm surrounded with love and it's amazing. Jasper, I would never, ever cheat on you." She turned to face him. "Why don't you trust me?"

"Because Alice only has visions like that if they're possibilities. Which means it's either you or Carlisle strongly considering it."

Kyleigh groaned.

"Just admit it, Kyleigh. Right now. If you say it right now, we can move forward."

"Say what, Jas?"

They crossed the Colorado state line. Kyleigh never thought she would be so happy to enter a new state.

"You considered leaving me for him. Or, he considered leaving Esme for you. It had to go one way or another."

Kyleigh groaned again. "Will you drop it if I say it?"

"Yes," he said quickly.

"I briefly wished that I could have a do-over and that I'd met Carlisle years ago and that we'd be together, but hear me out. When I say do-over, I don't mean this life, I mean I wanted us both to be born again and meet at the same time, at the same age, with him as a human and me as a healthy girl, so we could see what would happen. But Jasper, it was so brief, and so unlikely. It was a moment of weakness on my part, and as soon as I thought it, I felt sick."

Kyleigh looked over. There was a tick in his jaw.

"Jasper?" she whispered. When he didn't respond, she pulled to the side of the road so she could fully face him. "I'm sorry. Please, say something."

"I have nothing to say right now. Just drive, okay?" He shut his eyes, tilting his head back. "Drive, Kyleigh."

Kyleigh's hands shook, but she pulled back onto the road. They drove in silence the last hour of the trip. During the ride it had started to rain. Just before nine a.m., Kyleigh pulled into the nursing home parking lot and cut the engine. Jasper still had his head tilted back. Kyleigh reached out to touch his arm and his whole body tensed. She pulled away.

"Do you want to stay here while I go inside?" she asked quietly, hoping he would say no and come with her.

"I'll guard the car." Still he didn't look at her.

"Jasper. Jasper, look at me," she commanded. It took an eternity but he eventually turned his head. Kyleigh hated the look in his eyes. "Promise me you won't leave."

"Do you mean the parking lot or do you mean in general?"

"Both."

Jasper crossed his arms. "I won't leave the parking lot."

Kyleigh closed her eyes. "Okay," she whispered. "Thank you."

He barely nodded.

"I'll be back soon." She slid out of the car, worried her legs wouldn't support her dead weight, but they did, and she put one foot in front of the other, all the way into the home.

"Hi, I'm Kyleigh Montgomery," she said as soon as the receptionist looked up. "My uncle Eric came by the other day to visit my grandmother, and I was hoping to see her as well."

"What's her name?" the receptionist asked, her fingers poised over her keyboard.

"Angelina Gallinelli," Kyleigh told her. Eric had texted her the name after they got off the phone.

"And you are?"

"Kyleigh Montgomery. My mother's name is Margaret Montgomery, maiden name Gallinelli."

Kyleigh had one moment of panic when the receptionist gave her a hard look, but then she called over a nurse, who led Kyleigh down the hall.

"She may not remember you, though she seems to be having a nice day so far."

Considering it's only nine a.m., that really wasn't saying much. "Okay," Kyleigh said, smiling brightly.

The nurse knocked on the door lightly. "Angelina?" she said softly. Kyleigh heard a soft voice welcome her in, and the nurse led Kyleigh inside.

"Angelina, you have a visitor," the nurse said, her voice loud. "Do you remember your granddaughter, Kyleigh?" she asked.

Kyleigh's first impression of her grandmother was she must have been a beautiful woman once. Though her skin was wrinkled like tissue paper, Angelina's eyes were the same light blue-green as Kyleigh's. She had a frail body, though she wore a beautiful shawl around her white hospital gown.

"Hello," Kyleigh said nervously.

"Oh Rebecca, you've come home." Angelina smiled widely at her.

Kyleigh looked at the nurse, who smiled at Kyleigh.

"She gets confused sometimes," she said quietly.

"I do not," Angelina said. "And I'm not deaf.'

"Of course not, Angelina. I'll just let you and Kyleigh visit. If you need anything, I'm right down the hall." The nurse disappeared out the door.

"Well, come sit down," Angelina said after a moment. "Sit with me."

Kyleigh moved over to the chair Angelina gestured to.

"Where have you been?" Angelina asked. "You grew your hair out. It looks nice."

"Um." Kyleigh tucked her hair behind her ear. "I'm Kyleigh. I'm not sure who Rebecca is."

Angelina shook her head. "No, no, you are most certainly Rebecca. I'd know those eyes anywhere." She gave a small wink.

Kyleigh smiled despite herself. "Are you sure that's not just from looking in the mirror?"

Angelina laughed. "Always the comedian. Where have you been, dear?"

"Well, I lived in Washington until I was fourteen, then ended up in Oregon."

Angelina furrowed her brow. "You grew up here until you left when you were seventeen. Rebecca, what on earth are you talking about?"

"I've never been to Colorado in my life," Kyleigh said slowly.

"Rewriting the past doesn't make it go away, my dear. Believe me, I would know." She reached out and patted Kyleigh's hand. "Why, are you married? Who's the lucky gent?"

"His name is Jasper. He's from Texas."

"Of course you would go for a Texan, just like your father."

Kyleigh imagined her father: short, plump, so very northern. "Dad didn't grow up in Texas."

"Of course he did! He was very handsome. Do you have a picture of your husband?"

Kyleigh pulled up a photo on her phone, handing it to her grandmother, who laughed.

"Your father was blonde when he was young as well. He always said it went dark after he had you and Margaret."

At the mention of her mother, Kyleigh's ears pricked up. "I guess I don't remember him well. What was he like?"

"Oh, so kind and gentle. Very stoic and brave, unlike me." She laughed again, her eyes misting over. "He always said I was a handful, and later he said the same about you. Margaret favored him, of course. She was just so serious; not at all imaginative like you and I." Angelina gave Kyleigh her phone back. "Everyone was surprised that your father so obviously favored you over her, but I always thought it made sense: she was just too much like him. I'm not saying it's right to play favorites, but one can't help it sometimes."

Kyleigh tuned her out as she put it all together. Did she have an aunt? Rebecca? Was Angelina just crazy?

Kyleigh spent the next hour pretending to be Rebecca, trying to get as much information out of Angelina as possible.

"Angelina? It's time for tea," the nurse said, coming back in the room. "Perhaps you could come back later," she said to Kyleigh.

"Rebecca?" Angelina said, just before the nurse helped her out of bed into the waiting wheelchair.

"Yes?" Kyleigh asked.

"I forgive you for leaving us, you know? And I'm sorry for not trying harder." With that, she turned her full attention to getting out of bed, and Kyleigh left, feeling confused.

Kyleigh waited until she got outside before she ran, worried that Jasper left her. True to his word, though, he still sat in her mini cooper, waiting.

"Jasper!" she pulled open his door and fell to her knees. "Jasper, I have so much to tell you."

His golden eyes were still cool, but he listened to her story about Angelina.

"Jasper, I think I have an aunt," she finished.

"Kyleigh, get off the ground," he said finally.

Kyleigh stood slowly. Jasper ducked out of the car, standing in front of her and towering above. They stood facing each other, the foot between them feeling like miles. Jasper held open his arms. She hesitated for just a second then stepped into them, burying her face in his chest. They stayed in the embrace until she heard her name being called.

Together they turned towards the door. The nurse from before crossed the parking lot to them, clutching something in her hand.

"I'm so glad I caught you," she said, out of breath. Kyleigh hid a smile when the nurse looked at Jasper and gasped. "Um," she paused then looked back to Kyleigh. "Angelina wanted you to have this." She handed Kyleigh an envelope. With one last look of admiration at Jasper, and a jealous look towards Kyleigh, she bustled back into the nursing home.

"What is it?" Jasper asked.

Kyleigh slit the envelope open with her thumb, knocking it against her hand. A locket, much like the one around her neck, fell into her outstretched hand. Jasper took the envelope so Kyleigh could detangle the long, delicate gold chain. It took some effort, but Kyleigh popped the heart open and her jaw dropped. There were two people in the picture, a man and a young girl. The man had strong features and thick dark blond hair. The girl looked to be about thirteen, with long red hair braided neatly into pigtails. She had her arms wrapped around the man, and both were grinning widely.

"She looks just like me," Kyleigh said softly. "And he kind of looks like you." She grinned. "Damn, I went for a guy who looks just like my grandfather and I didn't even know it."

"Girls love us Texans," he drawled. "Is that Margaret?"

"No way. I don't think that woman even knows how to smile. I think that's Rebecca. Jas." Kyleigh looked up at him, eyes wide. "Jas, I think she's my mom."

"Okay, let's go over everything she said again," Jasper said.

They had written down everything Angelina had told Kyleigh during their brief meeting and now sat with the notes spread between them on the hotel room bed.

"Rebecca was my grandfather's favorite, she left home when she was seventeen, and for some reason my grandmother felt the need to forgive her, but what for?"

"For leaving?" Jasper guessed.

"Right, but why did she leave?"

"Maybe cause of my mother? Or my imposter mother," Kyleigh corrected.

"I wonder what the age difference is. Maybe Rebecca is younger than Margaret."

"That could be." Kyleigh flopped backwards on the bed, her long hair falling everywhere. "Jas?"

"What?" he asked.

"Thanks for staying. That's all."

"For better or for worse, right? Kyleigh, let's just drop it for the time being. We have a break through right now, we need to get on this." He reached behind him, patting her foot. "What did Eric say?"

"He was impressed and said I should consider becoming a detective." She laughed. "I don't think he realizes that it was just because I looked like Rebecca, but whatevs."

"We should go back to see her tomorrow," Jasper said suddenly.

"Why?" Kyleigh sat back up to look at him.

"See what else we can get out of her. We drove all the way here, so let's try again. Then maybe we can go someplace else. I did some reading. The Garden of the Gods isn't that far away."

"I always wanted to go there!" Kyleigh clapped. "Didn't make it this far before. Wait, Jasper." Kyleigh hit him.

"Wait, Kyleigh," he said, hitting her lightly.

"If my family grew up here, then we can go look her up someplace, right? Check out the high schools, go to town hall, go wherever people go to find their families!"

"Or just see if you can get that information out of the nurses at the station," Jasper suggested.

"Now that sounds like a job for you, my dear. Didn't you see the way that nurse was looking at you? Use your Texas charm and get it done."

Kyleigh normally would've crawled into his lap but she wasn't sure how far their new truce extended.

"Alright, we'll go back tomorrow. We should bring her something though. Flowers or something."

"We can pick some up along the way." Kyleigh looked out the window at the night. "I wish we could go now." She pouted.

"Downside of never sleeping: having to wait until the rest of the world wakes up. Maybe you should draw something."

"I don't want to draw right now. I'm too excited."

Jasper smiled. "We could pick up with that game of Scrabble."

"Did you bring the board? I thought that belonged to the cabin."

"I may or may not have stolen it," he said, sounding coy.

"You bad boy," she teased.

They moved all of her notes out of the way, setting up the board, and settling down to an intense battle culminating in Jasper technically winning, but Kyleigh tackling him to the floor.


	7. Chapter 7: the best night

Kyleigh ran the brush through her hair one last time, allowing it to fall around her shoulders, a little tousled, just the way Jasper liked it. She'd put on a pair of jeans and a plaid flannel shirt, hoping that it might elicit more memories from Angelina. Jasper appeared in the bathroom doorway. He'd put on jeans and a dark blue button down, similar to the outfit her grandfather had on in the locket picture.

"You about ready?" Kyleigh asked him.

"Almost. You're missing something."

Kyleigh looked down at her appearance again. "What?"

He gestured for her to spin around. She did as he requested, smiling when the locket appeared in front of her. She pushed her hair aside so he could clasp it at the nape of her neck. "Beautiful," he murmured. "It really looks like it was made for you."

"It feels weird not wearing the Cullen crest," she whined. She'd taken it off earlier, realizing it needed a bit of polishing.

"You can put it on as soon as we get back, darling," he soothed.

"Alright." She squared her shoulders. "I'm ready."

They waited until the afternoon to pull up to the nursing home. The nurse recognized Jasper and Kyleigh as soon as they walked in and didn't say anything as they walked down the hall. Kyleigh knocked on Angelina's door, again waiting before entering.

Angelina had a new shawl wrapped around her thin shoulders. She flipped the TV off as soon as she saw Kyleigh.

"Rebecca! I didn't think I would see you back here."

Kyleigh took the seat next to her grandmother's bed. "I had to thank you for the locket." She held it up between her fingers. "It's so beautiful."

"Yes. I was surprised that you left it behind." Angelina noticed Jasper standing behind Kyleigh. "Samuel?" she whispered. To Kyleigh's surprise, tears welled up in her grandmother's eyes. "Samuel, you've come back. How?"

"This is Jasper, my husband," Kyleigh said loudly. "Remember? I told you about him yesterday."

Angelina didn't seem to hear her though. She held out her bony hands to Jasper, who stepped around the bed, taking them.

"Oh, you're cold as ice," Angelina said, though she didn't let go. "You're so handsome. Oh, don't look at me," she said, laughing though tears were rolling down her cheeks.

"You're beautiful," he assured her. "Just as beautiful as the day we met."

Kyleigh raised her eyebrows at him. He gave her a fleeting glance, and she decided to roll with it.

"Samuel, look, Rebecca has come home," Angelina said. "She finally came home."

"I know, Angel, I know." His Texan drawl became more pronounced.

"I always loved when you called me that."

Kyleigh thought her face probably had to hurt by now, her grandmother was smiling so much.

"It's been forever, it seems." Angelina dropped Jasper's hands, and he pulled another chair over so he sat on her other side.

"It has, but we're back together now, aren't we?" His face broke out into his signature lopsided grin.

"Too bad Margaret isn't here," Kyleigh said, trying to steer the conversation around a little.

"She married that Harrison and never came back," Angelina said dismissively.

"Harold, dear, his name is Harold," Jasper corrected.

Angelina waved her hand around. "It doesn't matter anyway. She hated us in the end."

"What do you mean in the end, mum?" Kyleigh asked, the words rolling out of her mouth easily.

"I mean after you left and she met that man and she left too."

"Why would she hate us, though?" Kyleigh pressed.

"I don't remember her hating us," Jasper added.

"No one ever hated you, dear," Angelina said to Jasper lovingly.

Kyleigh tried hard not to think about how weird and wrong this whole thing was.

"Nor did they hate you." He winked.

"Considering the last time I spoke to Margaret she told me she hated me, I'm not sure that's true." She took Jasper's hand in hers, stroking it.

"But why would she even say that? You were a great mom." Again Kyleigh took a stab in the dark.

"Not always. As I've gotten older, I've questioned my choices." Angelina breathed a sigh that only people who've lived long lives can breathe.

"What do you mean?" Jasper prodded.

"Maybe we should've paid more attention to Margaret, added some sort of balance to our love, but Rebecca was just so," she trailed off, looking out the window. She waited so long, Kyleigh thought she might not answer. "She was just so precious to me." Angelina finished.

"To me too," Jasper added quietly.

"And Margaret could just be so difficult," Angelina broke off again. "Rebecca was easier to love."

Kyleigh stood slowly. Angelina didn't notice her back out so that she was around the corner, listening without being seen.

"Does that make me awful, Samuel? To love one daughter more than the other, just for simplicity's sake?"

Jasper didn't respond. This all was hitting a little close to home for Kyleigh. She felt like she was having the vampire version of heart palpitations.

"Of course, Rebecca wasn't perfect, as we learned. She…" Another long pause. "She broke my heart in the end."

"For leaving?" Jasper clarified.

"Losing both daughters was more than I could bear, and I'm so very sorry that I took it out on you." Angelina started to cry again.

Kyleigh pressed herself against the wall, squeezing her eyes closed.

"When you died so young, I knew it was my fault."

"No, Angel, it wasn't your fault," Jasper said quickly.

"I was a cursed woman. I would do anything to make it all right again." Angelina began to weep.

Kyleigh heard Jasper stand, whispering something she couldn't make out, then appearing by Kyleigh's side. He took her upper arm, guiding her out of the room.

Once outside, Kyleigh sank down onto the front steps.

"Ky?" Jasper asked after giving her a few minutes.

"Is it some sort of theme in my family? Abandoning, withholding love, running away? Does this go back for generations?"

"I don't know, Ky." He sat down next to her so he could pull her against him. "I don't know."

They stayed tangled together for a long time until finally Kyleigh pulled away.

"Let's list what we know," she said, her voice a little too loud, though Jasper didn't comment on it. "My mother was my hypothetical mom's older sister. For simplicity, maybe we should just call them by their first names. Okay, so Margaret is actually my aunt and Rebecca is my mom." The words felt weird on Kyleigh's tongue.

"Hypothetically," Jasper said.

"Right. My grandparents favored Rebecca, but then she ran away. Why would she do that? If she was loved so much, why would she leave?"

Jasper stroked Kyleigh's hair. "Maybe they loved her too much."

At the look Kyleigh gave him, he added, "what? It's a thing!"

"Oh okay. Anyway, then Margaret met dad-Harold and left as well. And then my grandfather died, and apparently my grandmother was mean to him."

"Sounds like a totally normal functioning family."

Kyleigh swatted at Jasper who ducked away. "Now what?"

"We find out what happened to Rebecca."

Kyleigh felt much better after she'd traded Angelina's locket for her Cullen locket. Jasper caught her staring at the picture of Rebecca and Samuel again.

"See anything new?" he asked.

"I'm hoping that truth will somehow come out if I stare at it long enough," she relied, not looking at him.

"How's that working for you?"

"It's not." Kyleigh tossed the locket aside in frustration.

"What's wrong, Ky? I thought this is what you wanted."

Kyleigh rolled over on the twin bed so she was looking at Jasper. "It is. It's just much more convoluted than I thought. I think we can pretty much say that Rebecca is my mom, right?"

Jasper considered this. "No. Just because you look like her doesn't mean you aren't Margaret's daughter. You have Angelina's eyes. There's a possibility that you just took after Angelina through Margaret."

Kyleigh groaned. "So this has us nowhere then."

"No it doesn't. It's very likely Rebecca is your mom, I'm just playing devil's advocate here."

"But if Margaret hated Rebecca, which she certainly seemed to, then why would she take me?"

"Sisterly love?"

Kyleigh rolled over again so she was on her back, staring at the old dingy ceiling. "This is very Harry Potter."

"So what you're saying is you're The Chosen One?" Jasper said, totally straight faced.

"Well, I am The Girl Who Lived."

"Nope, not really, dear."

"Harry sort of dies, and he comes back. That's what happened to me. Theretofore, I am The Chosen Girl Who Lived." Kyleigh stuck her tongue out at him.

"That's mature, Ky."

"The most mature, Jasper." She broke off into giggles.

"In all seriousness," he said, after allowing her a minute to calm down. "This is what we were all warning you about. Sometimes it's better to have holes in your past than to know the truth. You can't unlearn the truth."

Kyleigh considered this. "I still want to know, even if it turns out that I'm the spawn of Satan."

"I wouldn't go that far. Maybe like the great great great granddaughter of Satan."

Kyleigh glared at him, though he was smiling.

"Well that makes you Satan's son-in-law then."

"I'm not too worried either way, darling," Jasper responded. "We're the damned people. It's all the same."

"I'm not damned," she insisted. "I'm special."

"Ah, right, very, very special."

Jasper laughed and ducked away from the pillow Kyleigh threw at him.

"Focus!" she ordered, trying to look serious.

"Yes ma'am." He saluted her.

Another day, another day spent sitting in Angelina's room, prying information out of her.

"Mum, what was the last thing I said to you before I left? I can't remember." Kyleigh sat in her usual chair, to the left of Angelina.

Angelina gestured for Kyleigh to come closer. Kyleigh sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Let me just fix your hair, dear." Angelina fussed, running her hands through Kyleigh's long mane of red hair.

Jasper waited a few minutes then repeated Kyleigh's question. For some reason, Angelina responded better to Jasper than Kyleigh.

"Let me think now," Angelina said, all the while stroking Kyleigh's hair. "The last time we spoke was at the dinner table the night before." Subconsciously, Angelina began braiding Kyleigh's hair. "We were talking about colleges. Margaret was in her last year of college at the time, and I remember her being very cross with us for looking beyond community colleges for you. If we're being honest here, though, you were always more motivated than Margaret. Not that Margaret was a dummy, goodness no, she was smart as a whip all through high school. Things changed, though, when she went away to school. I still blame Harrison."

"Harold," Jasper corrected automatically, making Angelina smile.

"You always had a better memory for names, Sam." Angelina tied Kyleigh's hair with a hairband from her bedside table.

"Didn't I want to go to Brown?" Kyleigh asked.

Angelina laughed. "You wanted to go to New York, dear. You wanted to be a dancer."

"She danced?" Kyleigh said.

Angelina didn't notice the change in pronouns. "All through school. The number of hours we spent at the dance studio. You were in _Cabaret_ your last year of school before you left. That costume nearly did me in. I think I still might have scars on my fingers from sewing the sequins on!" Angelina laughed, her eyes misty with memory. "Then there was the time your dance school did a toned down version of _West Side Story_ and you practiced so much for it, your feet bled. Do you remember, dear?" she addressed Jasper. "Remember wrapping her feet in bandages?"

"Of course. She wouldn't sit still." Jasper winked at Kyleigh, who looked blankly back at him.

"Is that why I left? Did I leave for dance school?"

Angelina looked at her in surprise. "You hadn't finished high school yet, you left in the fall of your senior year. As far as we were aware, you never even applied to college." The older woman gave Kyleigh a strange look. "You're behaving oddly, Rebecca. Why are you asking about all of this?"

Kyleigh's brain spun with explanations. Under the cool stare of her grandmother, not even her mind was quick enough to make something up. Jasper saved her again.

"It was a long time ago for all of us. I'm sure Rebecca just wants your take on it. Isn't that right?"

Kyleigh nodded, feeling more grateful to her husband than she had in a long time. "Right. I feel so awful about what I put you through. I just want closure, and I don't think I'll find it until we talk it through."

Angelina gave her an appraising look. Kyleigh still felt unnerved by the fact that they had the same eyes. It was like looking in a mirror.

"Very well then. I still have the note you left…somewhere." Angelina glanced around, as though the note would just appear next to the bottles of pills on her bedside table.

"You do?" Kyleigh asked. She shot an excited glance at Jasper. "Would you have put it with your jewelry? To keep it safe?"

Angelina closed her eyes, a sign that she needed a nap. She became overwhelmed easily.

"Mum," Kyleigh said, "this is important. Do you know where you put it?"

Angelina didn't open her eyes. "Oh, it's somewhere, Rebecca. Let me rest and I'll find it later."

Kyleigh opened her mouth to protest, but Jasper stood.

"We'll come back later," he told the woman.

Kyleigh grimaced at him, but under his stern gaze, followed him out of the room. "We were so close!" she hissed as soon as the door shut.

"She's old, Ky, she needs to rest." Jasper crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. "We'll come back tomorrow. The note should hold plenty of answers, and we can wait until then. Right?"

Kyleigh really had no choice but to agree. "Right," she said, her voice flat.

Jasper threw an arm around his wife. "Buck up, Kyleigh, it's going to be okay. You'll see. Come on, I want to see The Garden of the Gods."

"This may be the coolest thing I've ever seen. And that's saying something," Jasper said hours later.

"I don't know, Tex. From what it sounds like, you haven't been many places," Kyleigh teased. She had her sketch book tucked under her arm, her other hand holding onto her pencil bag.

"That may be true, but I've seen a lot of things. Hybrid babies, vampire armies-"

"Werewolves, oh my!" she finished for him, ignoring his glare. "I want to draw the "Kissing Camels" before it gets too dark."

Dutifully, Jasper followed Kyleigh up the trail then watched her pace back and forth, looking for the best angle. She sank down onto a rock, arranging her sketchbook in her lap. Periodically, she would look up at Jasper. Sometimes he was staring at the other tourists, who would take a few pictures with their phones before moving along. Other times, he was watching her, and every time she caught him he held her gaze with his matching gold eyes.

Light was not Kyleigh's friend. Her fingers flew over the page, shading and smudging red and orange together, working to capture the dusty hue surrounding the formations. Her fingers were covered in pencil soon, though she was used to getting a little dirty. She smirked slightly, glancing up at her husband. Even now, his beauty occasionally took her breath away. She flipped her book to a fresh page, choosing a black pencil.

"What are you working on now?" Jasper asked, breaking the silence that had fallen between them for over an hour.

"Nothing." She covered the sheet.

"What? What are you hiding?" The blond walked over to her.

"I'm not hiding anything," she lied.

"You totally are."

" _Totally?_ Jas, you've spent too much time watching modern television."

"You, Miss Kyleigh, are evading. Show me your book." He held out a pale hand.

"No! Go look at some rocks while I finish!"

He dropped his hand in defeat. "Fine, fine."

He turned away and she let her arms go lax. Quick as a bunny, Jasper spun around, snatching the book away from her.

"Jasper Hale, you give that back!" she yelled, pouncing on him. He didn't even stumble at her weight. "Give it back!" she repeated.

"You're making a scene, Kyleigh. Just let me look." He flipped the pages, various drawings of the rocks whooshing past, until he got to the most recent drawing. "I just want to know-oh." He opened the book further so he could get a better look.

Kyleigh had only just started to fill in the outline of his tall, lanky frame. Though it was just a profile shot, the intensity pulsed off the page, from his confident stance to his strong jaw.

"I got tired of the rocks," she said, her voice quiet.

"I see." He brushed his fingers against his portrait. "Do you want to finish it?"

"Not now. Later. It's getting dark, we should go." She slid off his back, plucking her sketchbook from his hands. Really, she thought, it wasn't a big deal having him see it. The drawing just felt more personal to her than the others. Sort of like her Seattle mosaic. They walked in silence for a long time, but halfway to the car he laced his fingers through hers and she didn't pull away.


	8. Chapter 8: of my life

"Hi Kyleigh!" Rosalie's voice sounded tinny over the cellular connection.

"Hey Rose!"

"How's the journey going? Have you found your mom yet?"

Kyleigh pressed her back against the hotel room pillows. Rain sounds came from the bathroom where Jasper was showering. "Not quite. We have a good lead though!"

Rosalie stayed quiet as Kyleigh walked her through the events of the last few days, starting with her first conversation with Angelina, concluding with the mysterious note.

"What else have you guys done?" she asked once her sister finished her story.

"Uh, not much. Hello? Rosalie, don't you have anything to ask about my mom?"

Rosalie laughed. "Sorry, Ky, not yet. Maybe after you get the note, but for now it's all up in the air. How are you guys doing?"

"Well, we haven't killed each other yet." Kyleigh ran her fingers through her red hair, her wedding band catching on it.

"That's always a good sign. Are things better?"

"We have our good moments and our bad." Kyleigh sighed. "Mostly good, though. This is good. This was a good idea for us."

"Good, because I don't want to deal with another divorce."

Kyleigh shook her head. "Thanks, Rosalie, glad you care for me and my marriage."

"Hey, hey, you know I love you. You're the best sister I could ever want. I'm just saying, it would suck."

"Well, obviously." The water shut off. "How are things on the home front?"

"Boring without you. Seriously, I have no idea how I filled my time before, but my god is it a drag around here."

"You have Emmett!"

"I know, and he's wonderful! But aside from him, there's not much to do." Rosalie dropped her voice. "I'm starting to wonder if maybe he and I should go on a little trip too."

"You could go on a honeymoon. You haven't done that in, like, two months."

"Shut up, Kyleigh," Rosalie said over her sister's laughing. "You were right with what you said last month, about things being too quiet."

"Carlisle and Esme would be sad if we all left," Kyleigh said, sobering quickly.

"I know, but Carlisle has his job and Esme…I have no idea what Esme does every day but she seems happy."

"Keeps house and takes care of us."

The bathroom door swung open in a puff of steam, which Jasper emerged from, towel around his waist, looking like a _GQ_ model.

"That's true. Alright, I'll let you go. Emmett and I are going to watch a movie."

In the background, Kyleigh heard Emmett ask Rosalie for the phone. "Hold on, your brother wants to say hi. I'll talk to you later, Ky."

"Bye Rose!" Kyleigh called. "Hi Emmett," she said before he could say anything.

"What's your favorite scary movie?" he asked, his voice low.

"That only works if I don't know who's talking, Emmett." Kyleigh rolled her eyes at his antics.

"I want to know what your insides look like!"

"Weirdo," Kyleigh said, laughing. "Ooh! You guys should watch _The Cabin in the Woods._ Your doppelganger is in it!"

"How do you know it wasn't me?" Emmett asked, dropping the fake voice.

"It's you. You would've bragged to us if you'd been in a Hollywood movie."

"That is…yes. Okay, you win, sister. Now get your butt back here. The black bear population is thriving without you."

"All in good time, brother. Have a good night."

"You too, Ky. Hope ghostface doesn't get you in your sleep."

"That would be impressive, given the fact that I don't sleep."

"Right. Damn. Whatever. Good night, Kyleigh!"

Kyleigh plugged her phone into the charger on the nightstand. Jasper had changed into sweatpants though his shirt was still off.

"Everything good at home?" he asked, crawling across the bed to her.

"Quiet, apparently."

"Everything is quieter without you, darling," Jasper teased.

Kyleigh held a hand to her heart, "whatever are you saying? Are you, are you calling me…loud?"

"I wouldn't say loud, no." Jasper slid his hands across Kyleigh's stomach. "Boisterous would be a better word."

"How is that a better word?" Kyleigh asked, laughing.

"It's an SAT word. That automatically makes it better."

"You're so weird." She stroked his wet hair lightly. "What do you want to do? Scrabble? Movie? Terrorize the tourists?"

Jasper pretended to mull the options over. "How about twenty questions?"

"Twenty questions?" Kyleigh raised her eyebrows. "Why?"

"Because I'm tired of Scrabble, there aren't any good movies here, and I don't want to get arrested by the human police or the vampire police."

Kyleigh giggled despite herself. "Good answer. Fine, you first."

Kyleigh and Jasper walked up the steps of the nursing home hand in hand the next morning.

"We don't have to do this today," Jasper reminded her, pulling her off to the side. "Angelina isn't going to remember what day it is. We could wait a few days if you want."

Kyleigh glanced between him and the door, options swirling through her head. But Kyleigh had never backed down from a challenge, she wasn't about to start now. "No, I want to get this over with. Come on." She tugged him through the sliding door, nodding to the nurses who had become so familiar with their faces.

Once again, Angelina sat upright, staring at the TV in front of her. Kyleigh noted it wasn't on; not a good sign.

"Hi mum," she said, keeping her voice chipper.

"Hello there," Angelina looked at her blankly. Kyleigh's heart sank. "How do you do?"

"I'm good, mum. It's me, Rebecca." The words didn't even feel wrong anymore.

"Rebecca?" Angelina raised her eyebrows. Kyleigh looked over her shoulder, nodding for Jasper to come inside. "Oh, Samuel, you're here!" Angelina's eyes brightened.

"Hi darling," he drawled. "Don't tell me you don't recognize our Rebecca today." He clasped Angelina's wrinkled hand in his.

"Of course I remember her." Angelina glared at Jasper, a look so reminiscent of the one Kyleigh gave him every day it gave her pause. "Sit down, Rebecca. It isn't polite to hover."

"Yes ma'am." Kyleigh sank down in the chair next to the bed. Jasper whispered something in Angelina's ear, making the old woman laugh. Don't be jealous, Kyleigh thought. It's all an act. "Mum," she said a few minutes later, not able to handle watching her husband flirt with her grandmother. "Do you happen to know where the note I left went?"

"What was that, dear?" Angelina tore her eyes away from Jasper.

"She asked about the note she left the day she left us," Jasper repeated.

Angelina bit her lip, another characteristic Kyleigh was familiar with. "Look in my jewelry boxes, dear. Over there." She pointed a gnarled finger towards her dresser.

Kyleigh stood, rushing to the dresser, eager to find the note. Jasper and Angelina continued to murmur to each other while she rifled through her grandmother's belongings. There were plenty of beautiful pieces in the box, most wrapped in tissue paper.

"Mum, I'm not seeing it," Kyleigh said over her shoulder.

"Check the secret compartment," Angelina said back.

Kyleigh turned to her, wondering if she was joking. One look at Angelina's face told her she was serious. Jasper raised an eyebrow at his wife, which she shrugged off.

"Where is the compartment?"

"You should know, Becca, it's where you left the note in the first place." For the first time, there was a coldness in Angelina's voice. Kyleigh dropped the subject, deciding it was best not to talk for now.

"Tell me about Harold, dear," Jasper said. Kyleigh waited for Angelina to launch into a long monologue on her supposed uncle before resuming her search.

With nimble fingers, she felt along the edge of the velvet box, hoping to find some sort of latch or string. She cursed under her breath at the sting of an earring back piercing her finger. Then she found it, a slight gap in the fabric. Using said violent earring, she pried it open, careful not to dislodge any of the other jewelry. At first, all she saw were some photographs, which she pushed to the side. Nothing. She didn't see a note anywhere. No longer caring about making a mess, Kyleigh shoved her hand into the gap, grinning when she felt the frayed edge of a piece of paper.

Her hands trembled; she worried she would tear the old note from them, but she unfolded it gently. It was long, the handwriting messy as though her mother had also had shaky hands. Not ready to read it, Kyleigh checked the signature. Rebecca. Jasper's eye bore into her back. She knew that he knew she had it.

"Mum," Kyleigh said, interrupting Angelina's story. "I'm not feeling very well. I think I need to go lie down."

"Honey, are you okay?" her grandmother asked, her voice full of concern.

"I think I'm just tired. It's been a long week. We'll be back later, okay?" Kyleigh didn't wait for a response, instead hurrying out of the room. Jasper practically had to run after her, only catching up when he found her crouched down next to the car, head between her hands.

"Ky?" he whispered. She felt him crouch down next to her, his hands on her back. She smiled, remembering the first time he touched her.

"Yeah?" she said, her voice thick.

"What happened? What's in the note?" He tried to take the paper from her but she clutched it to her chest.

"Nothing. I don't know yet, I haven't read it. I just, I needed to get out of there. This could answer everything…or it could be nothing."

Jasper nodded, using his power to calm her down. "I know. Do you want me to read it?"

She shook her head. "I need to do it. Just not now. Can we go?"

"Sure." He helped her up. "Back to the hotel?"

"No, I need to get out of here. Out of Colorado."

Jasper opened the mini door for her, helping her slide into the passenger seat. For a comical moment, Jasper struggled to fold himself into the driver's seat, only finding relief when he managed to slide the seat back. "Where to, miss? The stars?" He wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Kyleigh stifled a giggle. "More _Titanic_? That's amazing."

"Anything for you, darling. But really, where to? Are we coming back to see your grandmother?"

"I don't know," Kyleigh whispered. "I don't think I can. Does that make me horrible?"

Jasper took his wife's hand, stroking his thumb against her palm. "Not at all. I understand. Anyone would understand. Where did you go next, all those years ago?"

"Napa Valley." She laughed. "I wasn't even old enough to drink the wine. I just thought I needed to go before I died."

Jasper cranked the engine. "Back to California we go!"

"Wait, Jas."

He paused, his hand on the gear shift. "Waiting."

"Let's go somewhere new." Kyleigh pulled the map out of the glove department, smiling when Jasper tugged it over his head for her.

"I thought we were following your journey," he said, voice muffled under the map.

"I think," she paused. "I think it's time to start a new path, don't you?"

"Sure, whatever you want. Could you hurry? I'm feeling claustrophobic."

Kyleigh stared at her husband's profile for a moment, outlined under a map of the United States. A laugh bubbled up from deep inside her. She placed a hand over her mouth, hoping to quiet it, but then another came up and another, until she doubled over in her seat, laughing harder than she had in a year. Jasper poked his head out from around the map, sending her into another peal of giggles.

"What on earth could possibly be funny?" he demanded.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she said, gasping. "It's just, you looked so funny and this whole situation is so weird and even after everything we've been through, you're okay with going along with me and…it's not really that funny." She fanned her face lightly, trying to calm down.

Jasper broke into his signature grin. "I think it's funny. And Kyleigh?"

"Yeah?" she said, still smiling.

"I'll go anywhere with you." The look on his face was more intense than Kyleigh had ever seen it. They held each other's gaze for several seconds, or it could have been minutes, or maybe hours, only breaking when Kyleigh grabbed his face, pressing her lips against his.

Their kiss became more carnal than any kiss they'd exchanged in ages, they're tongues battling against each other, only stopping when Kyleigh bit Jasper's lip and made him gasp. The map crinkled like an accordion between them.

"We're in a parking lot," he murmured, burying his face in her hair.

"That's okay," she whispered back.

"Can we go back to the hotel now?" He trailed his lips over her neck, sending shivers down her spine.

"Sure. We need our suitcases anyway, it's only practical."  
"Right. Practical."

He whizzed through the streets of Colorado Springs quicker than they'd gone the entire trip, barely putting the car in park before Kyleigh threw her door open, running for their room. He grinned, chasing after her for the second time that day.

"I believe I said I wanted out of Colorado," Kyleigh grumbled.

"You did, but you also said I could pick where we went next. Buck up, Ky, this is going to be worth it."

"I'd like this better if you told me where we were going."

"That would ruin all the fun," he parroted to her. They'd been walking for almost an hour.

"Now I know what it's like to be you." She sighed.

"That might also have been part of my plan," Jasper admitted. "Hey, don't hit me! I could report you!"

Kyleigh giggled. "Fine, fine, oh wise husband. Where are we?"

"Step up here." He held out an arm to her, mostly for show. Kyleigh was more than capable of climbing up the steep rocks. He followed after her, until they stood side by side.

"Now what? This is so-" Kyleigh gasped. "Holy catfish!" she squealed.

"Worth it, right?" Jasper nudged her shoulder.

She ignored him, instead taking in the sight in front of her. Splashes of color spread as far as she could see, covering the otherwise mundane rock formations; pink, blue, green, yellow, a breathtakingly flawless watercolor painting brought to life. "What is this place?"

"The Paint Mines. Pretty epic, right?"

Kyleigh entwined her fingers with his. "It's…it's so gorgeous." She slid down the rock, wanting to get as close to the colors as she could. "I don't even think I want to draw them. They're so perfect as is."

"Really?" Jasper sounded disappointed and Kyleigh realized why he'd brought her here.

"I think I can get over that though," she told him. "I just don't know if I'll be able to do them justice."

"Darling, if anyone can, it's you. Here, I brought these along for you." He handed her a fresh sketchbook and freshly sharpened colored pencils. "I'm going to go explore for a bit. Take your time."

Kyleigh felt more grateful to her husband than ever for giving her these moments of peace. She brushed some dirt away from the ground beneath her, wanting to protect her jeans. Using her knees as an easel, she got to work, not even touching her orange pencil.

"Wow, that's really good," a voice said behind her after an indeterminate amount of time. Kyleigh jumped and squealed, dropping her pencil. "Sorry!" the voice said.

A tan hand held out the pencil to her. She stood, holding the sketchbook to her chest. "Thanks. It's okay." Kyleigh brushed her hair out of her eyes so she could see her attacker. A young man stood in front of her, hat pulled low over his face.

"I hope you don't mind I was watching you for a bit. You're very talented." He smiled apologetically.

"That's fine." Kyleigh glanced around, looking for Jasper. "Thank you."

"Do you sell your drawings?" he asked, bringing back memories of her time in San Francisco.

"Sometimes, but this one isn't for sale." Kyleigh gave him one of her vampire-bright smiles.

"That's a shame. I'd buy it on the spot." He moved closer to her.

She stepped back. "Well thank you, but this one is for my husband." She repositioned her hand so her wedding band showed.

The man's grin faltered slightly but he recovered. "I see. And is your husband here?"

"He is, just around the corner. I wanted him to scout out another angle for me to draw." Kyleigh hoped it wouldn't come to this, but she was prepared to fight.

"A man shouldn't leave his beautiful wife out in the open like this." He took another step forward, which Kyleigh avoided.

"His beautiful wife can take care of herself," a low voice said from behind the man. The look in Jasper's eyes would have made the bravest man in the world cower. The guy backed away from Kyleigh, hands in the air. Kyleigh smiled sweetly at the man, watching him retreat in terror.

"I leave you alone for an hour and you get yourself into trouble," Jasper teased.

"It's a gift." She flicked her hair off her shoulder, winking at him. "He wanted to buy my drawing."

"I think he wanted more than that." There was still anger glowing in Jasper's eye.

"Well, he didn't get it, so no need to fret. Come on, I want to get a few more drawings in!" She linked an arm through his, leading him down the rocky terrain.

They stayed in the park until Kyleigh ran out of pages in her sketchbook.

"Don't want to draw it my foot," Jasper muttered. Kyleigh had decided drawing on Jasper's arm was almost as good as drawing in her book.

"Oh stop." She swatted him lightly. "We should get some food soon."

"Tonight? Maybe on our way out of Colorado?"

"Are we actually going to leave Colorado now or are you lying again?" Kyleigh skipped the rest of the way to the car, throwing her art stuff in the backseat.

"Yes, yes, dear wife, we will actually leave Colorado now."

"Finally!" Kyleigh started the car. "Let's head west again until dark so we can hunt. Then I vote back to California."

"Why California?" Jasper barely buckled his seatbelt before Kyleigh floored it out of the parking lot.

"There are a lot of cool places. Mono Lake, back to Yosemite, Big Sur, and so on. I was thinking we drive up the coast, back up to Washington. There's one more place I really want to see before we go home."

"Where's that?" he asked, watching the trees whoosh by.

"You'll see, all in good time, my friend." She winked.

"Kyleigh," Jasper said.

"Jasper," she replied.

"When are you going to read the note?"

Instead of responding, she jumped, swinging herself up into a tree. Jasper's sweater snagged on a few branches here and there, but she Tarzaned her way along the path, Jasper following along underfoot.

"You didn't answer my question," he called. She dropped from the tree, landing on his bare shoulders. She'd gotten a little overzealous with a bear.

"I don't know, Jas. I want to find the right place to do it. Colorado definitely isn't it."

"Okay," he said slowly. "Then what? After you find this magical note opening location, I mean. Do you still want to find your aunt and uncle?"

"I guess it depends on what the note says." She buried her face in his hair, breathing in his familiar scent. "I don't think I want to do this anymore," she whispered.

Jasper reached behind him, lifting her over his head and holding her against his chest, as he had done time and time again over the years. "Do what, darling?"

"Dig into my past. After I read the note," she trailed off. "I think I'm done."

"Are you sure?" He stopped walking. The sounds of the forest, cicadas, crickets, rustling, all faded away. "What if the note doesn't explain anything?"

"I don't know. I don't know where I'd go from here. Call up my parents and ask them what happened? Look for hospital records?"

"You're paying Eric to do this, right? Make him look into the hospital records. What good is he doing if you're the one doing all the investigating?"

"Yeah." She pressed her face into his shoulder. "I'm tired, Jasper."

"I know, love, I know." He stroked her long hair. "Let's go, I'll drive."

"Where to?" she asked.

"Mono Lake, right? I think California is the best place to go now. California dreamin' and all."

She gave him a small smile. "Okay. Let's go."


	9. Chapter 9: with you, riding

Kyleigh dreamed about him almost every night; about his benign smile, his golden eyes, the way he smiled when she said something that took him by surprise. She woke up with his name on her lips. And it was so, so wrong of her to feel this way. He'd always treated her like his daughter. Her thoughts pressed against her brain, making her head pound even more. The sharp pain had brought her to her knees twice during her walk through the sunny California vineyard. Both times, she'd shoved herself to her feet and forced herself to keep walking, fighting the urge to faint.

"Are you okay, honey?" someone called.

If only she had a nickel for every time she'd heard that question.

"Fine!" Kyleigh called back, blinking the stars out of her eyes. She needed help.

"Are you sure? You don't look good, sugar. Jim, go get this poor girl some water. Come on over, honey."

Kyleigh staggered her way towards the voice, a woman with a voice thick like honey. "I'm okay, really," she insisted, though she knew it wasn't true.

"Yeah, and I'm Pamela Anderson. Sit down here in the shade." A strong pair of hands gripped her elbows, lowering her to the ground. Moments later, a bottle was pressed against her lips. She drank the water greedily. "Poor thing. You were so thirsty. Where are your parents, hon?"

"I'm by myself," Kyleigh murmured, too tired to come up with a story.

"Do you live near here?" she pressed, the same questions she'd heard time and time again. Kyleigh shook her head, feeling weak. "You're burning up. We need to get you to a hospital. Jim, dear, help me pick her up."

"No," Kyleigh protested. "I'm okay, I just need to rest." She hadn't had her medication in two weeks.

"Sure you do." Kyleigh felt herself lifted in the air; her stomach rolled ominously.

"Put me down, please," she whispered, but the couple ignored her.

Kyleigh woke up in yet another hospital.

"Earth to Kyleigh." Jasper waved a hand in front of his wife's face.

"Ugh, why would I want to live on Earth?" she asked, jerking her head away from his hand.

"It's great, they got stuff!"

"You're chipper today." She sat up from where she'd been lying down, not sleeping but not quite conscious either.

"It's gorgeous outside. The stars are amazing. Come on!"

Kyleigh allowed Jasper to drag her out of the hotel room. Together they ran silently to the beach. Jasper wasn't lying; there were stars, hundreds of thousands, crowding the sky, reflecting in the lake, making everything look infinite.

"Wow…" Kyleigh breathed. She stepped barefoot into the water, enjoying the rippling against her skin. "Do you think we can swim in here at night?"

"I seriously doubt it, but since when do you follow rules?"

"Touché. Race you in?" She didn't wait for him to respond, instead diving straight for the water, barely making a splash. Jasper looked around before following her in. They swam straight out to the rocks in the middle of the lake, careful not to draw attention to themselves. Swimming proved difficult.

"I think I read that there's a lot of salt in this water," Jasper said, noticing her struggling to stay under water. "That probably explains the lack of swimmers."

"It's also after midnight," Kyleigh teased, using her arms to push her legs down.

"What were you thinking about when you were lying down?" Jasper asked. He watched her do a few somersaults, though he didn't think she was doing them on purpose.

"Just reminiscing on my past. Contemplating life. As you do." She finally gave up, choosing to float on her back.

"I wish I could read minds," Jasper admitted sometime later. They'd gotten tired of floating and drifted back to shore, choosing to lie on the sand and watch the stars.

"You wouldn't find much in my mind. Mostly Johnny Depp and puppies."

"I disagree. I'd love a penny for your thoughts."

She sat up on one elbow. "Ahem, my thoughts are worth way more than a penny."

"A quarter?" He raised his eyebrows, not even flinching when she splashed water at him. "Sorry, sorry."

"No you're not," she replied, trying to glare at him and failing. "If you really want to know, I was thinking about the time I ended up in the emergency room in Napa and made my great escape."

"Wait, what?" He sat up so he could look at her.

Kyleigh giggled. "I've never told you about that? Oh, it was great. In, like, a terrible way. But still kind of great."

The lights stung her eyes so that she could barely open them. She flailed her arm around, trying to find her alarm clock to stop the beeping, but felt resistance and a sharp sting at the crook of her elbow. Kyleigh forced her eyes open, only to be greeted by harsh white light in a harsh white room. "Oh shit," she mumbled. "Not again."

She turned her head back and forth, taking in yet another hospital room. There were no doctors or nurses in sight. Her mouth felt like cotton and her head still hurt, but she definitely didn't feel as bad as she did before. Kyleigh spied a water pitcher on her bedside table; she slid the IV out of her skin, ignoring the blood that seeped out of the tiny hole, intent on getting the water.

Not even bothering to use a cup, Kyleigh tiled the pitcher down her throat, choking on the water but not caring. Once that was drained, she sat up all the way, pulling off the other monitors hooked up to her. She had moments before the nurses would respond to the machines freaking out, so she moved fast, scooping up her clothes and running for the door.

"And they didn't see you running away in your hospital gown?" Jasper interrupted.

"Nope." Kyleigh grinned. "I was pretty fast for a dying girl. Plus I know my way around hospitals. I ducked into the first linen room I saw to change back into my clothes then I walked out of the ER like I owned the place."

"That is impressive." Jasper chuckled. "Only you. Why didn't you let them treat you?"

"No money, no insurance." Kyleigh shrugged. "And I didn't want help anymore. I wasn't done exploring. They pumped me with enough medication to carry me through another few months then…well, then I met you."

"Wow." Jasper twirled a strand of her hair around one of his long fingers. "That's kind of crazy. I tend to forget about how sick you were when we met."

"You knew me for, like, a week before Carlisle changed me," she responded, ignoring him when he jerked at his father's name. "But you did see me at my worst, and yet you liked me anyway." She poked his arm. "Silly."

He nodded a little stiffly. She decided against commenting, instead turning her attention back to the stars. One step forward, two steps back, she thought. "Let's go for a walk," she suggested, hauling him to his feet.

Though he didn't say anything to her, he didn't pull away when she slid an arm around his waist, and even tucked an arm around her shoulder. Baby steps.

The note sat in her own jewelry box, taunting her every time she stopped long enough to think of it. Even Jasper, king of patience, was growing restless, waiting for her to open it, but she couldn't. Not yet. The person she wanted to read it with was back in Oregon, and she couldn't well go back there without Jasper realizing it. Jasper went hunting without her one evening and she pulled out her phone, fingers poised over the keyboard. Before she could second guess, she hit dial and pressed the phone to her ear, trying to control her trembling hands.

"Kyleigh?" he asked. She could hear noises in the background; he was at work.

"Carlisle." As soon as she said his name, she felt calmer. "Hi."

"Hi, little one. What's going on?"

"I found my grandmother," she started. "And I have a note from her daughter…my possible mother. Not Margaret."

"Rosalie mentioned your theory. What does the note say?"

The background sounds grew quieter. She imagined him sitting in his large office, leaning against his mahogany desk.

"I don't know. I haven't read it." When he didn't say anything, she continued. "I'm scared, Carlisle. I'm scared of what the note will say. If it will answer everything or tell me nothing. If this will just lead to a dead end and I'll be left more hurt than before. And I," Kyleigh paused. "I need you to tell me what to do."

"Kyleigh," Carlisle sighed heavily. "I can't do that and you know it. You've always made your own decisions."

"I know that, but I can't do this one on my own." Her voice broke, though she couldn't cry.

"You aren't on your own. Jasper is with you." His voice was mild but Kyleigh jumped at the implication.

"I know he is," she replied, her voice reproachful. "But he hasn't been through all of this like you have. There's so much he doesn't know, and I can tell him, and I probably will, but you know everything about me."

"I highly doubt I know everything, Kyleigh. And he's your husband. You need to talk this through with him now. I'm not your guardian." He sounded so sad. Kyleigh covered her eyes with her hand.

"Carlisle…"

"Kyleigh." His voice firmed then softened. "Ky, this is your life. You don't have to read that note, you can burn it and come home. But we both know that you won't. No one says you have to read it right now, but Kyleigh?"

"Yeah?" Kyleigh rocked back and forth lightly, knees held up to her chest.

"Don't put too much weight into that note. It doesn't matter what the note says, not really. You know in your heart that you are loved by so many. That's what matters now, isn't it?"

Kyleigh nodded, glad that he didn't expect a verbal response.

"I'm going to go back to work now, little one. Stay strong."

"I always do," she said, her voice much more stable now.

"I know. Good night, Kyleigh."

"Good night, Carlisle." Kyleigh hung up the phone, tossing it down beside her. By the time Jasper returned from hunting, Kyleigh was halfway through a _Criminal Minds_ episode, the phone call mostly forgotten.

"Hello?" Kyleigh said, pressing the phone hard against her ear.

"Kyleigh?"

"Eric?" The reception in Yosemite was terrible. "What's going on?"

"I found your birth records!" he said, though it came out sounding like "I have mirth checkers." He repeated it two more times before Kyleigh caught the whole sentence.

"How? Wait, why?" She ducked into the bedroom of the cabin she and Jasper rented a few days before, the same as the last time they'd visited.

"I cold called all the hospitals in Colorado and eventually found an older nurse. Took her out, got some schnapps in her, and she told me she remembered a young red headed girl stumbling into the hospital late one night, a baby practically falling out of her. The more schnapps, the more information." She could hear the smile on his face.

"How did you know to do that?" Kyleigh asked, sinking onto the queen size bed.

"Your husband called the other day. He told me what to look for and I did and I think I found her. Her name is-"

"Stop!" Kyleigh yelled, holding up her hand. "I don't want to know."

All the breath rushed out of Eric's voice. "Why not? You hired me, right?"

"I did, but…I don't want to know anymore. Could I call you back? Like, when I'm ready, I mean." She didn't wait for an answer before hanging up.

Jasper sat, a large blanket spread out in front of him, his fingers clinking his knitting needles together. He looked up when he heard Kyleigh come back into the room. "Everything okay?"

"No," Kyleigh responded, her voice shaking. "No, everything isn't okay. Did you call Eric?"

Jasper lowered his knitting. "I did." No further explanation.

"Without telling me? Are you kidding me? What the hell were you thinking?" Kyleigh couldn't stand still, pacing back and forth in front of him.

"I realized the note probably wouldn't explain everything. Angelina would have told us what the note said, she would have had an explanation. And, Kyleigh, darling, this is what you wanted."

Kyleigh whirled around, slipping slightly on the blanket. "No! No it isn't and you knew that! I told you I changed my mind!" She didn't care that she was shouting.

"I told him to call me instead of you," Jasper responded, so calm in comparison. "I'm sorry you found out that way."

"Jasper, you can't do this, you can't just go behind me back. It's my business and-"

"And you were the one who started this whole journey, and you brought me along. At this point, I have a right to know what happened too."

"This is my story, not yours!" she started but Jasper cut her off again.

"No, Kyleigh, this is our story. It became our story as soon as I got in the car with you. Now, I asked Eric to call me so you wouldn't find out that way, but that doesn't change anything else."

Kyleigh ran her hands through her hair, completely agitated. "This is my story, and I didn't make you come with me. I invited you, but I didn't force you to get in the car."

Jasper stood, towering over her small frame. "You didn't, but I came anyway. I have followed you all over the country. I have pretending to be your grandfather. I have been patient and pretended not to notice the way you say Carlisle's name or the fact that you've called him behind me back."

Kyleigh dropped her hands to her side. "Is that actually what this is about? Jasper, you have to let that go. That is a nonissue now. And yes, I did call Carlisle last week, but I needed advice from an outside perspective."

"Carlisle is not an outside perspective," Jasper shot back.

"He is in this situation. You're right, you've been here with me all along. You're too close to the story now, Carlisle isn't."

"He's close to you though."

Kyleigh threw her hands up in the air. "For peet's sake, leave me then! If this bothers you so much, why don't you get the hell out? Go back to Alice or whoever or wherever!"

The silence between them was deafening.

"Is that what you want?" Jasper asked after an eternity.

Kyleigh bit her lip. "No, it's not, but if that's what you want, I'm not going to stop you."

Jasper smiled though no humor reached his eye. "You won't fight for me, Kyleigh."

"That's all I have done, this entire trip. I have been here with you, reassuring you that there is nothing happening with," she faltered, "anyone else. That I want to be with you. But you can't let it go, and if you can't, I can't be with you."

Outside, the world carried on. Birds sang to the rising sun; overeager hikers and kayakers stepped into the fresh air; children woke up their parents too early. Kyleigh and Jasper stood stalk still, the foot between them stretching a mile.

"Fine," he said, backing away from her. "Fine."

Kyleigh remained where she was, listening to him pack up his bag. "You don't have a car. The sun is coming up," she called to him, both points ignored.

"I'll figure something out," he responded, coming back into the room, suitcase in one hand. "Have a nice life, Kyleigh."

She watched him walk to the door, not saying anything as he wrenched it open then swung it shut, leaving her alone. Again.

Almost immediately her phone rang. Rosalie. Kyleigh couldn't bring herself to answer it. She sat on the couch, bringing the unfinished blanket with her, and lay down, squeezing her eyes shut.


	10. Chapter 10: your hand on my hand

Sleeping on a bus was worse than hell. Or at least what Kyleigh imagined hell to be. She buried her face in her old sweatshirt, breathing deeply to cover the disgusting bus smell. Downtown Corvallis, 5 miles read the sign they drove by. Thank god, she thought. Kyleigh had chosen this town by pointing blindly at a map; she wasn't even sure if there was anything there, but she had to get away from California. Always running, she thought, never stopping.

"Do you have a place to stay, honey?" the old woman across the aisle from me asked.

Kyleigh always seemed to garner attention from old women and creepy men.

"Yes," she lied. "My friend lives here."

She didn't believe her. "Do you want some money? I could buy you dinner again?"

"No, thank you so much though. You've done enough." Kyleigh smiled at her, though her dry lips protested. She looked like shit and she knew it.

"Take this anyway," she said, twenty minutes later when the bus made its final stop.

Kyleigh took the outstretched bills, shoving them in her bag and thanking her again. She spotted a payphone and moved towards it then remembered she had no one to call. Surely Carlisle and Trudy never wanted to hear from her again. All Kyleigh truly wanted to do was take a long shower and even longer nap. There were plenty of motels near the bus station but she decided to go for a stroll, hoping to find something a little quainter. The quiet streets were a welcomed change to the loud bus; shops were closing up, healthy looking workers locking the doors before heading home for the evening. She pulled her sweatshirt closer around her, shivering in the late fall air.

Darkness had almost completely fallen when she stumbled upon a small hotel. With frozen fingers, she tugged the front door open, wincing at the loud bell announcing her arrival. An older gentleman wearing an oxford shirt with suspenders stretched dramatically over his wide midsection smiled at her.

"Hi doll, looking for a room?" His large voice matched his frame.

"Hi there," she responded, still shivering slightly. "Yes please. How much for one night?"

He sized her up, still smiling. "How much do you have?"

Uneasiness filled Kyleigh like syrup. "Not much," she confessed. "Fifty dollars is about all I can afford for the night if I want to have money for food. That's probably not enough though."

"How old are you…?" he waited for her name, which she told him, deciding against a fake name. "Kyleigh. How old are you, Kyleigh?"

"I'll be nineteen in January," she told him.

"Let me guess, you don't have an ID or a credit card?"

She shook her head, praying for some mercy.

"Alright, you get one night for fifty dollars. I recommend going to the market to buy yourself some food rather than spend it on any restaurants." He handed her a room key. She could hardly believe her good luck so far.

"Thank you so much, Mister…" she raised her eyebrows.

"Ted. Just call me Ted."

"Ted, then." She grinned at him, again feeling her lips crack slightly. "Have a good night." Kyleigh hurried to her room before he could change his mind.

She double bolted the door collapsing on the bed as soon as her knees hit it. Hours later, she woke up disoriented, barely remembering the hellish bus ride. One look at the clock told her it was early morning. She stumbled into the bathroom, taking in her horrible appearance. Pale skin, pale chapped lips, hair wild, circles under her eyes. Kyleigh watched her reflection slowly fade away as steam flooded the bathroom, only stepping into the shower once the mirror was completely obscured.

The warm water caressed her aching muscles. She leaned back against the shower wall, letting the coolness counteract that heat. For the first time in several days, Kyleigh's sinuses cleared enough that she could breathe without choking. She waited until the water ran cold to shut it off, not even caring that she'd probably screwed the other guests over.

The only clean clothes Kyleigh had left weren't heavy enough for the cold air outside. She would have to layer dirty clothes to stay warm until she found a laundromat. She'd only accomplished pulling on one layer when she heard the doorknob turn. Figuring someone just mixed up the rooms, she ignored it, buttoning up her jeans. Then she heard a key slide into the door, turning slowly until a _click_ signaled it was unlocked.

"Hello?" Kyleigh said. "There's someone in this room already."

The door swung open, revealing Ted. Kyleigh relaxed. "Hi Ted. Do you need me to check out already?" It couldn't be past six yet, she thought.

"No, no, I just wanted to see how you're night was."

"Lovely, thank you."

Ted didn't say anything further, just staring at her. Kyleigh mumbled something lame about the great water pressure in the shower, still he said nothing. He stepped forward, she took a step back. He moved closer, she moved again, until she was against the back wall.

"Can I help you with anything?" she asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Well actually there is." Ted closed the gap between them so that he wasn't even a foot away from her. Instead of speaking, he reached for his belt. Kyleigh gasped.

"You know, I think I'll check out now. Thank you so much for the hospitality, but I have to be going."

Ted blocked her path. "Whoa there, kiddo. I gave you a discounted rate."

"I know, and I'm so thankful, but I'll just leave and we don't have to tell anyone anything." Again Kyleigh tried to get around him but he pushed her by the shoulders. She froze at the contact.

"Kyleigh, Kyleigh, Kyleigh," he whispered. "I think you'll find this is a fair trade. I did you a favor, you return it. That's how the world goes." He stroked a rough finger down her cheek.

Kyleigh winced like he'd hit her. "No," she whispered.

"Yes," he said, his voice almost sympathetic. "It will be much better for you if you don't fight it. Just…enjoy the moment." He tugged his belt free, unbuttoning his pants.

Kyleigh's heart pounded in her throat. He grinned when she slid her hand over him gently, even moaning slightly. Kyleigh's stomach turned, but she knew what she had to do. She stroked him for a few seconds until his eyes drifted closed then she raised a knee, hitting him in the groin as hard as she could. He doubled over and would have crushed her had she not ducked out of the way, grabbing her purse and a sweatshirt and fleeing the room, his cries following her.

The cold wet pavement froze her bare feet. Tears streamed down her cheeks, warming them up in the saddest way. She ran until she was several streets over, until she couldn't hold it in any longer and had to bend over a trashcan, retching violently, choking on air and bile.

"Hey, are you okay?" a male voice asked over the sound of her coughing.

"Yes, stay away from me!" Kyleigh shouted at him, not looking up.

"You need help. Let me help you," the voice said.

"Leave me alone!" she screamed, her voice hoarse.

She looked up from the trashcan. A small crowd had gathered around her. The man closest to her had his hands up in surrender, though he still seemed concerned.

"Stay away," she whispered, more tears falling from her eyes.

He backed away, hands still up. "All I wanted to do was help," he told her, his voice gentle.

"I don't need help. Get away from me," she whispered again.

A young woman broke free from the crowd, a parka over her arm. She placed it on the ground ten feet from Kyleigh. "Take it," she urged.

The people stared at her like she was a wild animal and in that moment, Kyleigh felt wild. She was out of her head. Another person came forward, another young man, holding socks. He tossed them onto the jacket. Then another person with a hat, and another with a scarf, and so on, until a small mountain of warm clothes sat in front of Kyleigh. Her eyes darted between everyone. She didn't think she could handle another second in the cold, so she walked over to the clothes, slowly and quietly. No one said anything, just watched her pull on the coat and socks, the hat, the scarf, the mittens.

"It's okay," a man murmured, holding a wrapped sandwich out to her. "Freshly made from the bakery. Take it."

Kyleigh snatched it from his hand, cradling it to her chest. She expected the crowd to vilify her; to treat her like any other crazy person, but instead an older woman stepped forward, holding a to-go cup.

"Cocoa," she said, handing it to the young girl.

Fresh tears welled up in Kyleigh's eyes. She took the cup with her free hand. Then, in front of everyone, Kyleigh sank to the ground, pulling her knees to her chest and pressing her face against them, sobbing freely.

Kyleigh ignored her phone until she couldn't stand it anymore, finally answering it several hours after Jasper left her. "Rose?"

"It's Carlisle, actually," the doctor said, mild mannered as ever.

"Carlisle. Help me."

"What can I do?" he asked. As he had over and over in the ten years they had known each other, he was ready to do whatever she needed, to keep her safe, to keep her happy.

"Talk to Jasper," she said. "I want him back, Carlisle."

"Kyleigh, that's between you and him," Carlisle reminded her gently.

"He won't listen to me. Have you talked to him?"

"No, but he talked to Esme, so I know most of it."

Kyleigh pressed her forefinger and thumb to the bridge of her nose, a move held over from her human days. "I never wanted this to happen."

"No one ever does, little one. What can I do?" he asked again.

"I don't know." She laughed. "I have no idea anymore. I've always known what to do. I've always had an answer. It may not have gone the way I wanted it to every time, but I've always figured it out."

"You have," he agreed, "so you can do it again."

"It's not just me anymore though. Jasper has to be taken into account as well. Or he should have been. I've been a fool," she said softly.

"You're young. You were young when you changed, you were young when you got married. Despite all you've been through and the level of maturity you achieved, at heart you are still so, so young, love."

"Should I have done this?"

"Done what?" he asked. "Gone on this literal trip down memory lane?"

"No, let you change me. Marry Jasper. Any of it. Should I have just let myself die? Maybe I got sick for a reason and I wasn't supposed to survive so long."

"Kyleigh." She jumped. She'd never heard him raise his voice at her. "Do not say that. Do not look at your illness as some act of god. Your future has always been in your hands. You may not have chosen the cards in your deck, but you choose the move you make next."

"Nice metaphor, Carlisle," she said, not being able to stop herself.

He laughed, the tension broken. "I thought you would appreciate it. But I mean it. You cannot change your past. I know you want to know what happened to you, and as a scientist I can appreciate that. But ignoring the scientist in me, I don't think it's worth this. This turmoil you have caused yourself. Haven't you been through enough?"

Kyleigh chewed her lip, spinning her wedding band around on her finger. Carlisle didn't know the half of it. "I've been through hell," she said finally. "My life has been one nightmare after another. You don't even know some of the things I've done, or the things that happened to me." She appreciated Carlisle's restraint in asking her to elaborate. "I need to finish what I started. I think," she paused, gathering herself, "I think it's the only way I'll get Jasper back. This will always be between us if I don't solve it."

Carlisle stayed silent so long, Kyleigh pulled her phone away to make sure the call was still active. "Okay. Do what you think is best, little one. You can always come home."

"I know." Kyleigh made herself smile. "Thank you, Carlisle."

"You're welcome, Kyleigh."

The words were there on her lips, begging her to say them but instead she wished him a goodnight and hung up the phone.

A twilight hunt left Kyleigh much more energized. She could handle this. As the sky turned from pink to purple to midnight blue, Kyleigh loaded up her mini cooper and took off, gliding quietly through the winding Yosemite roads, eventually merging onto the 152 en route to Big Sur. The four-hour drive gave her plenty of time to come up with ways to make Jasper love her again, though none of them seemed realistic. For example, throwing herself off a cliff and hoping he would save her probably wouldn't work. Dressing like Elvis and seducing him probably wouldn't help either. She giggled though she was by herself. "Oh god, I need to talk to someone other than me," she muttered, grabbing her phone and dialing her sister.

"Finally," was all Rosalie had to say.

"Sorry," Kyleigh said automatically. "I wasn't ready."

Rosalie sighed. Kyleigh imagined her sister perched on her favorite reading chair, legs tucked under her, looking annoyed. "What happened?"

So Kyleigh walked Rosalie through everything, from the fight they had before they left for the damn trip all the way to when he walked out of the cabin.

"Why would he think you're in love with Carlisle?" Rosalie laughed. "Obviously you guys are close, but seriously?"

Kyleigh knew she should tell Rosalie about Alice's visions but couldn't bring herself to do it yet. "You know how guys get," is all she could say.

"Ain't that the truth. Will you come home now?"

"Soon. I'm working my way home." Kyleigh pulled over at an empty landing, getting out so she could feel the sea air blow through her hair. "Is Jasper there? Did he come back?"

"No." Rosalie sounded sad. "We heard through Alice, actually."

"Wait, really? What's she doing there?" Kyleigh worked to keep the resentment from seeping into her tone.

"She's not here. She's staying with Bella and Edward and she saw it happen, so to speak. So she called here immediately."

Kyleigh pictured it, Alice waiting by the phone for the moment she and Jasper broke up, just so she could seduce him back. "Do you know where he is?"

"He isn't with her, Ky," Rose said, reading her sister's mind. "I don't know where he is. We haven't been able to reach him."

Kyleigh tilted her head back, looking at all of the stars. "Okay." She sighed. "So tell me what you think."

"I think you're both being children."

Kyleigh winced. She'd thought she was prepared for whatever Rosalie had to say, but it stung.

"I think you need to come back here now and focus on your marriage, because this clearly isn't working for you. You have the note, right? Open it. You're putting way too much weight on a piece of paper. Then call that PI back, hear him out, pay him and get your butt back here. No good is coming from any of this and I miss you."

"I miss you too, Rosalie." Kyleigh tucked her hair behind her ears. "And I'm on my way home. I need more time to think things through, but I promise I'll be home soon and…and I'll have put all this to rest by then."

Kyleigh could practically hear Rosalie's eyebrows raising. "Really?"

"Really. Everything will be better then. How are things with you?"

"Emmett blew up the Jeep."

"Wait, what?" Kyleigh almost dropped the phone from laughing. "How?!"

"He claims he was just checking under the hood because he heard a noise but I think he started messing around with it. Next thing you know BOOM the Jeep is up in flames and Emmett is running away, screaming like a kid."

"Oh good god," Kyleigh gasped out, still laughing. "What did you do?"

"Esme and I put the fire out then yelled at Emmett for almost an hour. It's okay, he bought us a new car and he's never allowed to touch it."

Kyleigh felt her first pang of homesickness. "I'm glad I brought my car with me then."

"I know, right?" Rosalie giggled. "He's such a doofus."

"Ah but he's your doofus, so that makes it okay," Kyleigh teased.

"Speaking of which, he just got back. I sent him to buy new movies. I'm tired of the ones we have here."

"Alright I'll let you go." Kyleigh walked back to her car, sliding into the driver's seat. "Thanks for still being my friend, Rosalie."

"Ky, we're sisters. I couldn't get rid of you even if I wanted to."

They hung up and Kyleigh pulled back onto the road, continuing her harrowing journey up Big Sur.

Luckily for Kyleigh, the next few days were overcast, which meant Kyleigh could hike during the day and not worry about scaring the locals. After her second day in Big Sur, she started carrying Rebecca's note around in her pocket, in case the moment struck and she was ready to read it. But not even the gorgeous cliffs and enormous trees could inspire Kyleigh to take the plunge, so there it stayed, weighing her down more and more each day.

"That looks lovely, Kyleigh," Henrietta said over the sound of knitting needles hitting each other.

"Really? Because I think it looks like a kidney." Kyleigh held up the navy blue hat for everyone to see.

"A darling kidney, though," Henrietta encouraged. Her own hat was, of course, flawless, just as everyone else's.

"Well as long as it's darling." Kyleigh continued to knit, though her fingers were growing sore and her eyes were heavy.

Henrietta must have sensed Kyleigh's fatigue for she said, "I think it might be time for Kyleigh and me to head home though. Benjamin will be home soon and we haven't even thought about what to have for dinner." Together, the two packed up their knitting, waving to the other six women in the group.

"Thanks," Kyleigh told her once they got outside into the early December air.

"Of course, hon. I was getting tired myself. There are only so many hats you can knit before you need a break, you know?"

"Absolutely."

Henrietta patted Kyleigh's freezing hand with her own warm dry hand, leading her to the car and taking her home, just as she had done one month earlier, when Kyleigh cried in the street. It turns out the hat, scarf and mittens were all made by Henrietta's knitting group and sold in the local shops.

"Come now, lovey," an old woman had said, her voice firm. Kyleigh had felt hands under her armpits, hauling her up to her feet. The world spun, but the hands on her elbows kept her upright. "Let's get you out of the cold, come on."

Like a child, Kyleigh had allowed the old woman, who she learned was Henrietta, to take her back to her husband's bakery, where she sat Kyleigh down by the fireplace and reheated her hot chocolate.

"I don't need to know anything other than your name," Henrietta had said, after Kyleigh started on her second mug of cocoa.

"Kyleigh," she whispered, tired of introducing herself over and over.

"I'm Henrietta. This is my husband Benjamin's bakery. Do you have a place to stay?"

Kyleigh thought about the hotel and shuddered, which Henrietta took as a no.

"Do you have any other clothes? No? Okay, we can fix that. We live up those stairs over there so when you feel ready, we can go get you into some clean clothes then I'll fix you some lunch. How does that sound?"

Kyleigh learned quickly that no one said "no" to Henrietta. She also learned that Henrietta didn't pry. She never had to provide an explanation for what lead her to breakdown in the streets of a strange town. She also never had to explain why she was sick all the time. In return for Henrietta's hospitality, Kyleigh helped knit hats for the NICU at the local hospital and worked at the bakery with Benjamin. For the first time in months, Kyleigh had regular meals and access to a shower. It was like heaven.

"I'm thinking stew for dinner. We had that leftover beef. What say you, Kyleigh?" Henrietta asked.

They were standing in the kitchen, surveying the contents of the refrigerator.

"Sure. We have carrots and celery I can chop if you want." Kyleigh didn't wait for confirmation, just grabbed the vegetables and headed over to her vegetable station. Soon the kitchen was full of delicious stew smells. Kyleigh added the chopped onion last then sat down at the kitchen table with Henrietta, fighting to stay awake.

"Go rest, child." Henrietta gave Kyleigh a gentle nudge, almost dislodging the young girl from the chair. "The stew will be a few hours."

Kyleigh yawned her consent, half dragging herself to her tiny bedroom. She crawled under the stack of knitted blankets, snuggling into the pillow, and drifted off.

Without Jasper to distract her, Kyleigh found it harder to stay focused on the present. So lost in thought was she that on several occasions, she walked smack into trees (though the tree usually came away with more damage than Kyleigh did). She needed him back. She needed.


End file.
